Your Baby’s Growth Week By Week

BWS - 15

You may have seen a friend's baby laughing, rolling over, or playing with a squeaky toy, and wondered when your own little one will start doing the same. Rest assured, these moments will come in their own time, following your baby’s unique developmental path, which, like all children, follows a beautifully natural rhythm.

Just like all living things, whether plant, animal, or human, babies develop according to the innate patterns of their kind. The unfolding of your baby’s growth is a gentle reminder of this truth. Physical, emotional, and intellectual milestones will come in a sequence, moving from broad, general skills to more specific abilities. Your baby will first lift his head before he can raise both his head and chest. He’ll push up with his hands before learning to creep and crawl, and crawling will come before walking. While an unfavorable or restrictive environment can delay progress, a loving, nurturing home provides the perfect conditions for your baby to flourish, week by week, in every aspect of development.

The general summaries provided in this appendix reflect developmental averages for babies born through normal deliveries and without significant health concerns. Babies born after difficult labors might experience slight delays in early milestones, but these are usually temporary. Every baby is unique, so some may reach certain milestones up to two weeks ahead of the average, while others may take a bit longer, up to two weeks beyond the typical range. Both are entirely normal. The word ‘normal’ itself refers to a range of time, not a single moment, spanning one to three weeks for most milestones.

As you watch your little one grow and change, keep these developmental markers in mind, and celebrate every new achievement. This is a magical time, filled with small but significant transformations, so take plenty of photos, because these precious moments come and go quickly!

Week One: In the first week after birth, your baby’s primary activities will be sleeping and more sleeping. Just as you went through labor, so did your little one, and rest is essential for both of you. While you might catch glimpses of your baby’s eyes now and then, most of the time they will be closed in peaceful slumber. At this stage, don’t expect much beyond feeding, diaper changes, and sleep. Extended waketimes are rare in these early days. Within the first couple of days, your baby should pass their meconium stool, and if you’re breastfeeding, your transitional milk will soon start to replace the colostrum.

Week Two: By the end of the second week, your baby should regain, or come close to regaining, their birth weight. Around day ten, you might notice your baby going through their first growth spurt. This is also the time when your baby will begin to recognize your voice and start to focus on close objects, such as your face, when held about 10-14 inches away. Keep an eye on the umbilical cord, it typically heals and falls off sometime between weeks two and three.

Week Three: In week three, your baby will begin to recognize the comforting scent of both Mom and Dad, showing signs of wanting to snuggle in close. Waketimes will start to extend beyond just feeding, and you’ll notice a more predictable routine forming. While you’re not yet working on sleep training, this week often marks the first feed-wake-sleep merge, as those two middle-of-the-night feedings may begin to transition into just one.

Week Four: By the fourth week, your baby’s feeding and waketimes will stretch to about 50 or 60 minutes. This increased wakefulness reflects their growing awareness of the world around them. You’ll start to hear those sweet cooing sounds, perhaps even see the beginning of a smile. Your baby will focus on objects and faces within their range of vision, with black and white standing out more clearly than other colors. You might notice them gazing at your eyes with fascination. By now, your baby’s routine will likely settle into the feed-wake-sleep pattern, and nighttime sleep might stretch to four or five hours.

Week Five: At this point, your baby will begin to lift their head slightly while lying on their tummy, a wonderful new skill that lets them turn toward sounds, including your voice. With nighttime sleep becoming more consistent, stretching to four or five hours, waketimes will bring more smiles and even purposeful grasping of objects, like holding onto your finger. Waketimes will become their own distinct part of the day, separate from feeding, and they’ll continue to lengthen as your baby grows, giving you more time for activities together.

Week Six: By the sixth week, you’ll notice your baby starting to track your movements. Their neck muscles will grow strong enough to hold up their head for short moments and even lift their chest when placed on their tummy. Your little one is beginning to discover their hands, and you’ll see them holding and examining them with newfound wonder. Their movements are becoming more fluid and purposeful, and you may even experience the joy of five to six hours of nighttime sleep.

Week Seven: Your baby’s senses are blossoming, and they’re now smiling in response to your touch and voice. You’ll also notice your little one looking at you intently while listening, so talk and sing to them often, whether they’re in their infant seat, during blanket time, or even while taking a bath. Their vision is developing, and they’ll begin to prefer bright-colored objects over the black-and-white ones they previously enjoyed. Physically, your baby may show early signs of rolling, though not fully yet. Waketimes are now well-established as independent activities, lasting between thirty and fifty minutes.

Week Eight: By this week, your baby’s sweet cooing and little sounds will melt your heart, especially after a satisfying meal. Physically, they’re getting stronger, raising their head and chest during tummy time. At eight weeks, many babies following the PDF routine start to sleep for seven to eight hours through the night, giving everyone a bit more rest.

Week Nine: After the first-morning feeding, especially once your baby begins sleeping through the night, you’ll be greeted with the most heartwarming smile. Take notice of how they watch you closely, particularly focusing on your lips as you speak. Your baby is now even more responsive to your touch and playful voice, often smiling back at you. You’ll also start to hear intentional cooing, their way of telling you everything in their world is just right.

Week Ten: Keep an eye on your baby’s hands, they may start to bat at toys or grasp small objects like a baby rattle. Your baby is now more attuned to your voice, even in a room full of people. This heightened awareness makes them love being near you even more. Placing them in an infant seat while you prepare meals or do chores can be a delightful waketime activity. Continue to talk, sing, and explain everything you’re doing, your words are incredibly important now. Nighttime sleep may stretch to ten hours, and waketime activities may last around an hour.

Week Eleven: This week marks the first signs of early movement. When held upright, your baby might begin making small stepping motions, and with your gentle guidance, they may even start supporting their own weight with their legs. Their neck muscles are growing stronger, allowing them to keep their head upright and steady. Hands fascinate your little one, and you’ll often catch them gazing at or holding them with awe.

Week Twelve: You've come so far from those early days! Now, if your baby is on their back, they’ll begin lifting their arms and legs in the air. While on their tummy, they’ll use their arms to raise their chest and head. Tummy time becomes increasingly important, as your baby starts entertaining themselves during waketime. This is a beautiful sign of healthy development. You’ll also hear more cooing, gurgling, and squealing, and many babies are now sleeping nine to twelve hours at night. Waketimes continue to be about an hour, alongside feeding times.

Week Thirteen: By now, your baby is likely on a steady three to four-hour routine, with nighttime sleep stretching between ten and twelve hours. They’re still mesmerized by their hands, but you’ll notice a new discovery, those hands are finding their way to their mouth. Your baby will laugh and coo more frequently now without needing any prompting from you. Toys with multiple textures and bright colors will grab their attention, and their head control will improve significantly. They’ll be able to raise their head to about 45 degrees while lying on their stomach and hold that position for a few seconds.

Weeks Fourteen and Fifteen: Your baby’s social smile is now in full bloom, shared with you and others. During waketimes, you’ll notice their growing ability to concentrate, and their play is becoming more intentional. Improved hand-eye coordination allows your baby to reach for toys, like a rattle, and bring them to their mouth. Toys that fit into their hands help reinforce the grasping reflex. You’ll also see them getting close to rolling from side to back or back to side, though rolling from back to tummy is still a little ways off. This is a time of great growth; your baby is now starting to respond to small cause-and-effect moments.

Weeks Sixteen and Seventeen: Though your baby has been responding to your voice for some time, they are now beginning to recognize their name. With a little help, your baby can sit up and show even more interest in fun objects. You may see the first signs of their displeasure if you take something away. Their attention span during tummy time is becoming more focused, thanks to the excellent sleep they’ve been getting.

This period of optimal alertness is the result of good sleep. Your baby’s grasping ability is improving, and they’ll start picking up larger, chunkier toys like blocks, though their attention may not stay on them for long. Babbling has become a regular part of their waketime, and they’ll even entertain your friends and family with their cute sounds. At this point, many babies can hold their heads steady while sitting on your lap, another wonderful milestone in their growing strength and awareness.

Weeks Eighteen and Nineteen: Your baby is starting to sit up with less support than just a few weeks ago, though they may still wobble a bit. They are becoming more independent and enjoy playing alone in their crib or playpen. This is a great time to introduce some new toys, replacing the ones they’ve already gotten used to. You’ll also notice them intentionally reaching for objects and moving toys between their hands. To encourage this skill, try holding a toy out for them to reach rather than placing it directly in their hand, it will help strengthen their coordination.

Weeks Twenty and Twenty-One: At this stage, babies are naturally drawn to human faces, and a simple game of peek-a-boo is sure to bring out smiles and giggles. This game brings your faces close together and delights your baby with the warmth of your voice and the joy of seeing your smile. Your baby may also become fascinated with their reflection, so keep a mirror nearby. Now, they will start making intentional sounds, discovering they have control over these delightful noises. This newfound ability is a sign of growing awareness and decision-making as they begin to link sounds with movement, focusing their eyes on objects they want to explore.

Weeks Twenty-Two and Twenty-Three: The first signs of "creeping" are beginning to emerge, so be extra mindful during blanket time. Creeping, where your baby starts pushing themselves around on their tummy, is a big developmental step! It may seem like a small thing, but it’s a major milestone in their neurological growth, one that is connected to future cognitive abilities. (Crawling is still a few months away, about half of all babies start crawling around seven months, and the other half between eight and nine months.)

Your baby’s world is now all about investigation and discovery. They are eager to move toward objects of interest, though they may not yet have the dexterity to grasp them fully. However, their hands and arms are beginning to respond to their curiosity. You’ll also notice them figuring out how to transfer objects from one hand to the other, a skill that will continue to improve. As they approach the six-month mark, you may also see the first signs of teething, watch for that first tooth to pop through, along with a little extra drooling!

Weeks Twenty-Four to Twenty-Six: You’ve reached the halfway point of your baby’s first year, and what an incredible journey it has been! Think back to those early newborn days and marvel at how much your little one has learned and grown in just six months. (Make sure you get plenty of rest, the next six months will be filled with even more exciting growth and development!)

By this stage, your baby should be creeping across the floor, rolling over both ways, sitting up without support (or getting close to it), and holding their head steady and upright. They are starting to recognize each member of your family, along with familiar faces from extended family. The highchair has likely become a permanent fixture in your kitchen now as your baby moves from exclusive breast milk or formula to their first taste of solid foods like rice cereal and small servings of fruits and vegetables.

As you approach week twenty-six, your baby will start showing signs of being strong enough to sit up on their own without any props. It’s all part of the wonderful growth and development world that your baby is exploring. Every phase is a precious milestone, so enjoy each moment!

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Multiple Births - The Endless Party

BWS - 13

Contributed by Dr. Eleanor Womack

A baby is a precious blessing, a tender gift wrapped in joy and wonder. And when that blessing comes in the form of twins, triplets, or more, your heart overflows with multiplied love. Yet, alongside that overflowing joy comes an added measure of care and effort. It’s simple math—no, perhaps it’s more like the magic of multiplication!

Parenting always calls for thoughtful planning and gentle organization, but this becomes all the more true with multiples. It tends to do so when the unexpected arises in pairs or even trios. Where parents of a single baby might learn from one mistake, parents of multiples often face their challenges in multiples, too. But take heart because the same holds true for your triumphs—each success is magnified, each joyful moment multiplied.

In our home, we’ve always seen parenting our triplets as a celebration of life that never quite stops. When our three boys were tiny preemies, needing to be fed every three hours, we turned those midnight feedings into cherished moments of togetherness. The "feeders" would gather in the same room, sharing stories, jokes, or simply the warmth of each other’s presence. Even at 3:00 a.m., we were buoyed by our shared commitment, knowing that each feeding was more than a task—it was a time to bond, to laugh, to make memories in the most unexpected of moments.

From the earliest days, children are deeply attuned to your spirit. If you see their care as a heavy burden, they will feel that weight, too, and the days will seem long and weary. But if you approach each moment as an adventure with wonder and patience, your children will meet you there, filling your life with the sweetness of each stage. Every day, every smile, every small triumph is precious beyond measure.

Bringing Them Home

Pregnancies with multiples often come with the tender challenge of prematurity. In the early days, you may find yourself caring for tiny babies who need extra medical attention. It’s possible your little ones may spend time in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU), where they receive the nurturing care they need to grow stronger. Some of your babies may come home one at a time as they reach safe milestones, such as gaining enough weight or developing the ability to feed on their own. There may even be monitors that come home with them, like apnea or heart monitors, offering you the reassurance that your child is breathing steadily.

Cribs: In the beginning, your babies will be small and won’t be moving around much. It’s perfectly fine to let two or even three babies share a crib, snuggled close to each other. It’s a sweet and safe arrangement while they’re tiny, but as they grow and wiggle, giving them their own space is important. This ensures that they don’t unintentionally become a risk to one another as they start to move more freely.

Diapers: With triplets, you’ll find yourself changing between 24 and 30 diapers a day, making diapers a notable part of your budget. You have options, of course, and it’s a good idea to weigh them carefully. Cloth diapers may seem like the more affordable choice upfront, especially if you’re washing them yourself. However, the time and effort required for constant laundry can be significant, and cloth diapers tend to increase the chances of diaper rash because babies can’t go as long between changes. With their lower absorbency, cloth diapers often lead to more frequent changes, which can be tricky when you’re already trying to keep track of who’s been changed and when.

Disposable diapers, while more costly, offer a level of convenience that can bring peace of mind. Babies are less likely to feel uncomfortable if a wet diaper goes unnoticed for a short time, and it’s easier to keep up with their needs when you have so much else to manage. Some families find that using a commercial diaper service provides a middle ground—offering savings over disposable diapers while also sparing you the time and effort of washing cloth ones. While you will have soiled diapers waiting for pickup, a diaper service might be a helpful option for some. I personally lean toward disposable diapers, but every family’s situation is unique. If a diaper service works for you and helps keep your little ones comfortable and dry, it could be a wonderful solution and save you some costs along the way.

Finding Help

As I gently guide expectant mothers of multiples, I often see one common misstep: trying to take on this beautiful yet demanding journey all on their own. Families often find themselves on a tight budget, and hiring help seems out of reach, so Mom and Dad set out with the noble intention of managing everything themselves. But, my dear friend, please don't make this mistake. You cannot, and should not, try to do it alone.

The good news is you don’t need to spend money to receive the help you need. There are many heartfelt alternatives. Extended family members are often more than willing to step in, mainly when your babies are settled into a routine of eating and sleeping. Schools in your area—high schools, colleges, seminaries, or yeshivas—often offer classes in child development, and your home could become an excellent, hands-on learning environment for kindhearted students and their teachers. Places of worship, like churches and synagogues, are filled with caring people who would love to lend a helping hand—you need only ask.

If one or more of your little ones come home with medical monitors, you might even qualify for in-home nursing care, potentially provided through state assistance. To explore this, contact the social worker in your hospital's neonatal intensive care unit or speak with your pediatrician. They can guide you toward helpful resources.

When someone offers to help, always say, “Yes, please!” Keep a daily planner handy to assign a specific time and task to those kind souls who offer assistance. Whether it's caring for your babies or tackling household chores, such as laundry or picking up groceries and prescriptions, every little bit helps. Don’t hesitate to delegate. Asking for and accepting help is one of the best ways to preserve your peace of mind and savor the joy of raising multiples.

Feeding Multiples

Are you thinking about breastfeeding? Many mothers of multiples can breastfeed, but ultimately, the right decision is one that you and your babies will make together. Your ability to breastfeed may depend on a variety of factors, including your babies' maturity at birth, whether they require care in the NICU, whether you had a Cesarean section and the number of babies you’ve had. While mothers of twins often find more success in breastfeeding, mothers of triplets may face additional challenges. If your babies come home with you immediately, establishing a breastfeeding routine will be easier.

As mentioned in Chapter Four, mother’s milk is a remarkable gift. It is a complete and perfect source of nourishment, easily digested and packed with the ideal balance of proteins, fats, and essential antibodies that help to build your baby's immune system. Even if your babies are in the NICU and you don’t plan to breastfeed directly, you might consider providing them with milk using an electric breast pump. Many pediatricians recommend this, and insurance companies often cover the cost of pump rentals while your baby is in the NICU. Premature babies, in particular, benefit greatly from the antibodies in breastmilk. But please, never feel guilty if breastfeeding isn’t possible for you. Formula-fed babies can grow up strong and healthy too.

Each of your babies will have their own unique preferences. While you may plan to breastfeed all of them, one or more might prefer the bottle over the breast. Some mothers successfully breastfeed their multiples on a rotating schedule—one baby may have a bottle while the others nurse. Other moms can produce enough milk for their babies, even triplets. An excellent electric pump can be incredibly helpful in maintaining your milk supply for multiples. You may find that after feeding one or two babies, you can pump enough to feed the others by bottle. Once breastfeeding is established, it can become a wonderfully smooth process, but it may not start out that way—especially after the stresses of a high-risk pregnancy. Be gentle with yourself, and seek guidance from a professional lactation consultant. Breastfeeding multiples may not come naturally, and asking for help is okay.

If your babies are born premature and have low birth weights, they may sleep almost constantly. They might even sleep through diaper changes, baths, and feedings. Premature babies often respond to stimulation by retreating into sleep, and it's important not to fight this natural response. Focus on feeding them the best you can, but don’t try for more than 30 minutes every 2½ to 3 hours. From the start of one feeding to the beginning of the next, no more than 3 hours should pass. Try to feed and burp each baby for about 30 minutes, then let them rest for the remaining 2 to 2½ hours of the cycle. Even if a baby only takes in a small amount of milk or spits up, stick to this schedule. If your baby spits up 10 minutes into a feeding, gently try again until the 30 minutes is up.

Monitoring your babies' hydration is important in caring for newborns and premature infants. Each baby should have 6-8 wet diapers per day. If you are breastfeeding, this is a helpful sign that they are correctly latched and receiving enough milk. However, keeping track of wet diapers can be tricky with multiples. Even simple details can slip through the cracks in those early, sleep-deprived postpartum weeks. To make things easier, write everything down. Keep your Healthy Baby Growth charts near the changing table and update them regularly. You might even color-code them, assigning each baby a different color, making tracking their progress easier.

As your babies grow and mature, feedings will become smoother and quicker—you may even finish feeding each baby in under 30 minutes. Sticking to a feeding, wake-time, and nap-time routine for each baby is important. When one baby wakes at night to feed, gently wake the others and feed them all together. However, if one baby wakes early from a nap, resist the urge to feed them right away. Instead, check their diaper, soothe them, and help them learn to self-soothe and fall back asleep.

Sleep For Multiples

Sleep is essential not only for your little ones' happiness but also for your peace of mind, especially when caring for multiple. With newborns—particularly small or premature babies—it’s easy to become focused on how much they’re eating, how often, and whether they’re gaining weight consistently. My husband and I applied the PDF (Parent-Directed Feeding) principles from the very beginning with our triplets, and we’ve encouraged many parents of multiples to do the same. The real key to growth and healthy weight gain is sleep. A well-rested baby will eat well, but a tired, overstimulated, and sleep-deprived baby will cry, fuss, nurse poorly, and often spit up.

You might worry that if your babies don’t take a full feeding, they’ll wake up hungry before their next scheduled feeding. I certainly had that fear! But, more often than not, they wake up rested and ready for their next meal. The surprise is that well-rested babies tend to eat more effectively. By focusing on sleep, you’re setting them up for better digestion and stronger, more successful feedings.

As your multiples grow, they will settle into their own wakefulness and sleep patterns. In the early days, they may fall asleep during feedings, or they might even stay asleep throughout. As they get older, they’ll still get drowsy after eating, but with a bit of gentle stimulation, you can keep them awake for playtime before their next nap. It’s essential to incorporate some independent playtime during their wakeful moments. When naptime arrives, your babies might show signs of sleepiness by becoming fussy or complicated to soothe or seem cheerful and wide awake. Either way, put them down awake. With multiples, it’s not practical to rock each baby to sleep every time. Instead, your little ones need to learn the valuable skill of self-soothing. This is a crucial part of their development and will help them navigate stress and sickness as they grow. If they learn to sleep on their own early in life, they’ll turn to sleep as a source of comfort when they’re tired, rather than becoming more stressed by crying.

If your babies have been sharing a room since birth, they will likely learn to sleep through each other’s cries. There’s no need to separate them when one is fussing. If one baby has a particularly hard time settling down, you can go in every 10 minutes to offer gentle reassurance—a pat, a quiet word, or a quick diaper check. Your role is to guide them toward self-comfort but not to stay long enough for them to fall asleep in your arms. The goal is to lay them down awake so they can learn to fall asleep independently without rocking or patting. It can be challenging, especially with multiples, but it’s a skill worth cultivating for both you and your babies.

Establishing a consistent feed-wake-sleep routine is key. Changing diapers and putting three babies down for a nap can take 15-20 minutes. One common pitfall is allowing your babies to fall asleep in activity chairs or swings during wake time. It’s understandable—you may be trying to juggle household tasks, answer a phone call, or tend to another baby’s needs, only to find that the others have dozed off sitting up. While it’s great that they can fall asleep on their own, they must do so in the right place—their cribs. If this happens frequently, they may struggle to learn how to self-soothe in their cribs. Plan ahead when you can, and put your babies awake in their cribs whenever possible. That way, when they do fall asleep sitting up, it will be a rare exception, not a habit.

One of the most frequent questions I hear from parents of multiples is, “Our babies are about four months old and feeding every four hours, but they’re not sleeping through the night. Why?” My advice is to stick to a strict 3-hour feeding schedule during the day while encouraging sleep at night. Often, I get a call just a few days later with reports of a “miracle”—one or all of the babies are now sleeping 8 hours at night!

The first rule of nighttime sleep is this: Don’t be tempted to stretch out the time between daytime feedings until your babies are sleeping at least 9-10 hours at night. They need those regular, 3-hour feedings during the day not only to meet their nutritional needs but also to help them distinguish between night and day. A consistent 3-hour daytime routine will achieve both.

As your babies continue to grow, another delightful challenge will arise. Between six and nine months, your little ones will begin to discover each other. That’s when the fun really begins! While they won’t wake each other up by crying, they may wake each other up with giggles and playful antics. They’ve found built-in playmates! To help manage this, you can place quiet toys in their cribs after they’ve fallen asleep so the early risers can play without disturbing their siblings.

It’s also important to teach your multiples to stay in their cribs until you give them permission to get out. This is a valuable skill for all babies, but with multiples, there’s an added safety concern. An unsupervised toddler can be a potential danger to their sibling. We taught our triplets that they couldn’t get in or out of their cribs without help, and by using a small stepladder when needed, we reinforced the idea that climbing in and out was impossible without assistance. They stayed safely in their cribs until after their third birthday, with no unauthorized climbing adventures.

Routine For Multiples

The routine for each baby should remain consistent, but with multiples, their feeding and sleep schedules may vary depending on several factors. How many babies are there? How many caregivers? Are you breastfeeding? Each baby should have a pattern of feeding time, waketime, and naptime, and it’s important not to change that order. The only exceptions are late-night feedings, which skip waketime, and premature babies who may not yet be ready for waketime due to neurological immaturity.

If you have triplets and are often the only caregiver, you may choose to stagger their schedules to make things more manageable. For example, you might begin with Baby A at the top of the hour, finish feeding after 30 minutes, and then move on to Baby B, while Baby A enjoys some waketime nearby in a bouncy seat. In the next hour, Baby C wakes up to feed, and Baby A is ready for their nap. Once all three babies are fed, you'll have about 1½ hours before the cycle starts again. With two caregivers, two babies can be fed at the same time, making things a little smoother.

When you have additional help, keeping all the babies on a similar schedule becomes easier. With two helpers, all three babies can be fed simultaneously. Since babies eat at different paces, you may notice a fast eater and a slower one. Once you figure out who eats the quickest and who takes a bit longer, you can set up a system where one helper feeds the slow eater while another feeds the fast one and the baby in-between. For breastfeeding moms, you can nurse two babies at once while a helper bottle-feeds the third.

Waketime for Multiples

In the early weeks, you won’t need to worry too much about waketime, as your babies will mostly be sleepy, but soon enough, they’ll begin to stay awake after feedings and show curiosity about the world around them. A reclining upright seat is a wonderful place for these early waketime moments, allowing your baby to observe and move their arms and legs while also staying upright to help reduce spit-ups. These seats are also useful for later stages, such as bottle-feeding or introducing solids, but always remember to supervise your baby when seated.

You don’t need three of everything for waketime activities. Babies typically lose interest in an activity after 10-20 minutes, so rotating playstations works well. You might have one baby in a wind-up swing, another in a playpen with a rattle, and the third in a bouncy seat playing or spending time with you. Every 15 minutes, rotate the babies to the next activity, offering them new experiences and keeping things engaging.

Individual time is key to keeping multiples happy. They need moments of independent play each day, and just as important, they need one-on-one time with Mom and Dad. It’s natural to think of multiples as a unit, feeding, changing, dressing, and bathing them together to maintain a sense of order. While this ensures everyone’s needs are met, structuring their waketime to include individual play can break the routine and make each child feel special. For instance, leave two of the babies with a helper or spouse and take one for a stroll or read a book to just one while the others enjoy independent play.

As your little ones grow into toddlers, they’ll face the challenge of always having a sibling nearby, sometimes grabbing at toys or competing for attention. A playpen can be a special refuge for them, offering a space where they can explore and play without interruptions. It’s one piece of baby gear you may want multiples of! Having their own playpen gives each baby some personal space, and it also provides a much-needed break for you—whether to answer the phone or prepare a meal, knowing they are safely occupied. Start introducing playpen time around three to four months, beginning with just 10 minutes a day and gradually increasing the time. By the time they’re one year old, they should be able to enjoy independent play in the playpen for at least 40 minutes.

A Word To Husbands

The heart of a harmonious family life lies in a strong, loving relationship between husband and wife. This central bond shapes every other relationship in the home, either positively or negatively. Nurture it, protect it, and make it a priority! Your strength as a parent is deeply connected to the strength of your partnership as a couple. This is especially true when raising multiples, which is why it is so vital for Dad to be an active presence at home. Your wife can only truly listen, share, and enjoy time with you if she feels your support and encouragement.

In many ways, your wife takes on the role of primary caregiver—she is the chief feeder, diaper-changer, bather, and teacher to the little ones entrusted to both of you. She carries the weight of these responsibilities without pause, often with little or no downtime, needing to remain calm and steady 24 hours a day. This constant demand for her energy is essential because she makes critical daily decisions for your babies. The more you cherish, serve, and support her, the more you’ll see the rewards of a calm, composed mother and peaceful, secure children. A little bit of your love and help will go a long way toward building a joyful, loving family.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Taking Care of Baby and Mom (Part Two: Mom)

BWS - 12

As a new mom, taking care of yourself is just as important as caring for your baby. Your well-being directly impacts your ability to nurture and bond with your little one. Proper rest, nutrition, and moments of self-care not only help restore your energy but also support your emotional and physical health during this transformative time. Remember, a healthy and happy mom can give so much more to her child. By caring for yourself, you are also caring for your baby, building a strong foundation for both of you to thrive together. Here are a few items to consider, espeically for breast-feeding moms.

Diet

A well-balanced diet will give you the strength and energy you need to keep up with the demands of motherhood. Along with eating well, don’t forget to keep taking your prenatal vitamins during breastfeeding, your body still needs those extra nutrients to support both you and your baby. And when it comes to staying hydrated, water is your best friend. Try to drink about 8 ounces with each feeding to help with milk production. Although it might seem like drinking milk would increase your milk supply, it’s not necessary to increase your dairy intake, water is really all you need.

Breastfeeding Odds and Ends

Breastfeeding is such a beautiful bonding experience, but it can come with its own set of challenges. Let’s talk through some common ones so you feel prepared.

If your little one is sleepy during feedings and not nursing well, don’t worry! This happens often, especially in the beginning. Try changing their diaper or gently undressing them down to just the diaper to wake them up a bit. If they still seem too drowsy, you can use a cool, damp washcloth on their tiny feet to help rouse them enough to nurse better.

If you ever feel that your baby isn’t gaining weight as expected or seems to be losing weight, reach out to your pediatrician right away. It’s always better to check for any underlying issues. If everything looks good, sometimes supplementing with a small amount of formula after breastfeeding can help until your baby’s weight is back on track.

For mamas of premature babies, breastfeeding might look a little different. Your pediatrician will guide you, but don’t worry if your baby can’t nurse right away. You can pump and store your milk, giving your little one all the benefits of your breastmilk, even if it’s through a bottle at first.

Now, expressing milk, whether for comfort or convenience, can be such a helpful tool. The best time to pump is right after the baby’s first feeding of the morning when your supply is at its highest. You can use an electric pump, which can be purchased or rented, and your local pharmacy might even have one available. Or, if you prefer, a hand pump works too, just be gentle and rhythmic while you pump. For manual expression, support your breast with your hand underneath, and gently press and release around 30 times per minute to help the milk flow.

When storing your milk, make sure to use a clean, sterile container. Mark the time and date so you can keep track, and if you’re storing it in the fridge, use it within 24 hours. For longer storage, freeze your milk at 0 degrees Fahrenheit, and it’ll stay fresh for up to six months.

When it’s time to thaw your milk, place it in a pan of warm water and gently increase the temperature until it’s ready. You’ll notice the milk separates into layers—this is totally normal! Just give it a little shake to mix it back together, and it’ll be ready to serve. Be sure to use the milk right away after thawing, and toss any leftovers after feeding, since your baby’s saliva can break down the milk. And remember, never microwave breastmilk—it can destroy some of those wonderful immune-boosting properties your milk provides.

You’re doing an amazing job, mama. Breastfeeding isn’t always easy, but with time, patience, and a little support, you’ll find your rhythm. Your baby is so lucky to have you nurturing and caring for them every step of the way.

Breast-Feeding Challenges Relating to Mom

We how tender and challenging breastfeeding can be, especially when it comes with its own set of hurdles. You are doing an incredible job, and it’s okay to face these challenges with patience and self-compassion. Let’s talk about some of the difficulties that can arise on this journey, and how a mother can manage them.

Engorged Breasts
Engorgement is common, especially in the early days when your milk is transitioning from colostrum to mature milk. You might notice it more if you’ve missed a few nursing sessions or if your baby isn’t emptying your breasts fully. This happens more often with your first baby, but don’t worry, it gets easier with each child. To help reduce engorgement, try to keep up regular feedings, aiming for every 2-3 hours. If the discomfort persists, expressing some milk manually or with a pump can bring relief. A warm shower before feeding can also help ease the discomfort, though I know taking several showers a day isn’t always practical, one or two should help until things settle down.

Tender, Lumpy, or Painful Breasts
In those first few days, you might experience tenderness before your mature milk comes in. Your baby has to work a little harder to get the thicker colostrum, which can feel uncomfortable. Once your milk flow increases, you’ll notice the suck-swallow pattern becomes more rhythmic, and the tenderness should ease.

A well-fitting nursing bra can make a world of difference, too. If your bra is too tight, it can contribute to the discomfort. Try alternating sides at each feeding and ensuring your baby empties both breasts. A lactation consultant or your local maternity store can help you find the right fit if you need it.

Mastitis
Mastitis can happen when bacteria enter through cracked nipples or if a milk duct gets clogged. It’s not uncommon, affecting about 10% of nursing moms, but it doesn’t mean you have to stop breastfeeding. Wearing a tight or underwire bra can sometimes cause this, especially if the bra shifts when you lift your arms. If you do experience mastitis, getting prompt treatment is important. It usually improves within a couple of days with the right care. Warm compresses, mild pain relief, and sometimes antibiotics (prescribed by your doctor) can help you feel better and keep nursing.

Yeast Infection (Candida Albicans)
Thrush, a yeast infection, can pass from baby to mom during breastfeeding. If your baby has white patches in their mouth and seems fussy or struggles to nurse, this might be the culprit. It can cause soreness for you too. If you notice these signs, reach out to your pediatrician so treatment can start quickly. Once it’s under control, you and your baby can return to nursing more comfortably.

Plugged Duct
If you notice a sore spot or a lump in your breast, you may have a plugged duct. This can happen if the breast isn’t fully emptied, or if your baby isn’t latching well. Applying warmth and gently massaging the area before nursing can help, and try to nurse on the affected side first. Keep resting and caring for yourself, mama, if it doesn’t improve after a day or so, check with your doctor.

Inverted Nipples
For some mothers, flat or inverted nipples can make breastfeeding a little more challenging, but it doesn’t mean you can’t nurse successfully. If this applies to you, getting help with latching and positioning early on can make all the difference. Your doctor or a lactation consultant can offer guidance and options that will work best for you.

Sore Nipples
Sore nipples are often caused by your baby not latching properly, and it’s something many new mothers experience. Try making sure your baby is well-positioned, and alternate starting sides during each feeding to give your nipples time to heal. Allow your nipples to air dry for a bit after nursing, and applying a little lanolin or Vitamin E oil afterward can be soothing. If the soreness becomes too much, don’t hesitate to talk to your doctor.

Too Much Milk
Having an oversupply of milk might sound like a blessing, but it can bring its own issues. When there’s too much foremilk, your baby might get more lactose than fat, which can cause gas or discomfort. If you notice this happening, try reducing the time spent nursing on each side, and express just a little milk before feeding to slow the flow. It’s all about finding the balance your baby needs, and you will get there with time.

Not Enough Milk
If you feel like you aren’t producing enough milk, it can be a little worrying, but don’t let it discourage you. Poor milk production can happen for many reasons, from stress to insufficient fluid intake, or even if baby is having too many supplemental bottles. Make sure to nurse every 2-3 hours and try to relax as much as possible during feedings. If you need extra help, expressing milk after nursing can sometimes stimulate more production. Remember, your health matters too, if you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s okay to ask for help and speak to your doctor.

As stated, breastfeeding may come with challenges, but as a new Mom you are not alone in this. We have a host of support Moms ready to help walk you through any challenge, with single goal of helping you build a beautiful bond with your little one.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Taking Care of Baby and Mom (Part One: Baby)

BWS - 11

The days and weeks following the birth of a precious little one are a whirlwind for new parents. There’s so much to learn and so many new rhythms to discover as they welcome this tiny life into their home. Mom and Dad find themselves with a heightened awareness, eager to ensure that everything unfolds just as the books and charts suggest it should. Yet, for most first-time parents, the true challenge is uncovering what “normal” truly means for their unique baby.

In these pages, we hope to offer you the gentle guidance you need during this tender time of adjustment. We’ve divided this journey into two parts: first, this blog post explores the developmental milestones healthcare professionals will look for as your newborn grows, and in our next post, we will address the physical and emotional changes a mother might experience in the postpartum period. The more you understand the changes ahead, the more prepared you’ll feel to embrace the magic of this new chapter.

Apgar Score

You have probably heard other parents talk about their baby’s Apgar Score, but you may not fully understand what it means or how it is used to assess a newborn’s health. The test was designed and perfected in 1952 by Dr. Virginia Apgar, who used it to determine how birthing anesthesia affected newborns. Eventually, her test became the normative tool to help doctors determine babies' health status at birth. The test measures five critical areas of newborn vitality within the first minute after birth and five minutes later. Each point is given a value, and the sum total provides the score. A score of 7-10 is considered normal and indicates a baby in good condition. A score of 4-6 indicates a baby who probably needs respiratory assistance, and a score of 0-3 indicates the need for lifesaving intervention.

Newborn Basics

All newborns have similar needs, characteristics, and reflexes that are considered normal and are all part of what makes us human. Discovering your baby's uniqueness is more than a pastime; it is a necessity of true nurturing and begins with becoming familiar with a baby’s physical characteristics. What do you need to know?

Characteristics of a Newborn

Head:

• Measures 25 percent of the baby’s body size.

• Average circumference is 13-14 inches.

• Neck muscles are weak, so baby’s head needs support at all times.

Fontanels:

Areas of the skull (soft spots) that are not yet joined but are held together by membrane tissue. (The soft spot is where the skull is not fully formed, allowing room for the brain’s tremendous growth during the first year, when over 50 percent of your baby’s total head growth occurs.)

Anterior fontanel (on top of the head)—closes at approximately 18 months of age.

Posterior fontanel (at the back of the head)—closes at approximately three months of age.   

Hair:

Some babies are born with a full head of hair; others have no hair at all.

It is not uncommon for babies to lose some or all of their hair within weeks after birth. 

Milia:  

Little white bumps resembling pimples on the baby’s forehead, nose, and cheeks.

Nearly 50 percent of newborns have the condition of Milia. It is not contagious, and most cases disappear within the first month of life; although in rare cases it could last up to three months. There is no treatment for this condition, except time.

Exact cause is not known, but Milia may develop when tiny skin flakes become trapped in small pockets near the surface of the skin. Do not attempt to remove. Contact baby’s doctor.

Eyes:

Color: Caucasian babies are usually born with blue eyes with their permanent eye color becoming evident between six months to one year of age. Babies of African and Asian descent are usually born with brown eyes and the color does not change.

Newborns are born cross-eyed because of immature eye muscles. If your baby’s eyes continue to wander after three months of age, contact your pediatrician.

By six months, a baby’s eyes should be focusing together. If they are not, ask your baby’s pediatrician to refer you to an ophthalmologist.

There may be swelling or discharge from your baby’s eyes because of the antibiotics applied at birth.

The tear ducts begin to produce tears around the second or third week of life.

Sensory: Vision

Newborns possess full visual capacity in terms of eye mechanics, but the brain center controlling vision is not yet fully developed. This is why babies are born nearsighted, meaning objects far away appear blurry. It is estimated that infants are able to see objects about 8-14 inches away.

At birth, babies see bright and contrasting colors. Their full color vision is not developed until approximately three or four months of age, when they can determine hues and light shades.

Sensory: Hearing

A baby can hear fairly well, but not perfectly, right after birth. A Newborn Infant Hearing Screening Test is common practice and usually performed prior to a baby’s hospital discharge. Ask your pediatrician if it is part of his or her discharge protocol.

Infants tend to regard loud noises as disturbing and soft sounds as soothing.

Sensory: Taste and Smell

Both are well-developed at birth. Researchers have found that many babies are able to differentiate between their mother’s milk and the milk from another woman.

Skin:

“Lanugo,” or fine, downy hair, is sometimes present on a baby’s body at birth. This is seen more frequently in premature infants and normally disappears within a few days or weeks on its own.

Dry, scaly skin. Is sometimes associated with peeling and is seen two-three weeks following delivery, and in babies born after 40 weeks of gestation.

Ruddy Skin. The newborn’s skin often has a ruddy hue, and for the first few days the hands and feet can have a bluish tint. As the baby’s circulation improves, his skin color will become more consistent.

Rash. A rash may develop if the baby is overdressed or wearing clothing made of an irritating fabric. About half of all newborns display a harmless rash of little red bumps that disappear on their own, usually within a week. If you have any concerns, contact your baby’s healthcare provider.

Birthmarks. There are a variety of classifications of birthmarks (such as “strawberry,” port-wine stains, and salmon patches) and moles that may appear at birth on newborns.   

Breathing:

Newborn breathing rate: 30-60 breaths per minute. It is normal for breathing to be irregular and shallow. Some babies may be noisy breathers at night.

Hiccups are normal, and many mothers know when their baby is having a bout during pregnancy. When the baby’s diaphragm matures, the frequent hiccups disappear.

Extremities:

A baby’s arms and legs are disproportionately short for his body. It is also normal for the arms to be bent and held close to the chest with his little hands in a fist.

Baby’s legs are positioned similarly to that assumed in utero, and it is normal for most newborns to appear bow-legged.

Nails are usually long at birth, soft and pliable. It is important to trim them weekly to prevent the baby from scratching his face. As babies grow and become more alert and aware of their surroundings, nail trimming becomes more of a challenge. The safest and easiest way to trim a baby’s nails is when he is sleeping or right after his bath, when he is relaxed and his nails are slightly softer. Newborn baby clippers are available at your local drug store. (Do not use adult clippers on your baby.)

Reflexes:

Certain reflexes are present at birth, most of which are vital for survival. They are also strong indicators of the vitality and health of the central nervous system and are often tested at the various well-baby checks. As the baby matures, it is normal for some reflexes to disappear and others to change. It is important for parents to have a basic understanding of how reflexes work, because they indicate how well their baby is doing and help pediatricians evaluate normal brain and neurologic activity. While there are about 90 named reflexes, here are the 10 most common: Sucking, Swallowing, Rooting, Gagging, Coughing, Grasping, Stepping, “Babinski,” “Tonic Neck,” and “Moro reflexes.”

Sucking reflex: This reflex was active in the womb and is very strong at birth, since it is required for feeding. Usually any stimulation of the baby’s lips will elicit a sucking response. Babies often suck on their thumbs, fingers, or fists.

Swallowing reflex: This reflex is also present before birth, as babies will swallow and then excrete amniotic fluid in utero.

Gagging reflex: Prevents choking.

Rooting reflex: This is when your baby turns his head in response to stimuli to receive food.

Coughing reflex: This helps clear the air passages of mucus.

Grasping reflex: If you place your finger inside the palm of your baby’s hand, he will grasp it—often with enough strength to allow the baby’s upper body to rise up.

Stepping reflex: If the baby is held up under the arms in a standing position, his little legs will make walking motions.

Babinski reflex: Many years ago, Dr. Joseph Babinski discovered that when he firmly stroke the sole of a baby’s foot, the big toe turns up and the toes fan out. This reflex may continue up to two years of age. (If it continues after that, it may be a sign of some nerve damage.)

Tonic Neck reflex: This reflex, also called the Fencing reflex, happens when your baby turns his head to one side: his leg and arm on the same side will extend, while the opposite limbs bend. It is connected to your baby’s ability to crawl on his hands and knees, which has other neurologic implications, and is one of the reasons Tummy Time for a young baby is so important.

Moro reflex: This happens when your baby is startled: his arms thrust out as if to embrace you and his legs straighten and stiffen. The Moro reflex is present in all newborns and usually remains until four to five months of age. Its absence at birth can indicate a problem.

Caring For A Newborn

The following are routine baby-care practices that will become part of Mom and Dad’s day.

Umbilical Cord Care: Shortly after birth, the umbilical cord is clamped and cut, leaving an inch-or-so stump that is saturated with a drying agent. Over the next several days the stump will turn black, and it usually falls off between the first or second week of life. Here are guidelines for umbilical cord care.

Keep the stump dry. Parents were once instructed to swab the stump with rubbing alcohol after every diaper change. Researchers now say this might kill bacteria that can help the cord dry and separate. Instead, expose the stump to air to help dry out the base. To prevent the diaper from covering the stump, fold the front flap of the diaper away from Baby’s stomach so the stump remains exposed.

There normally is an unpleasant odor associated with the drying of the stump, but an excessively foul odor may indicate an infection. If you notice this problem, contact your healthcare provider.

Call your pediatrician if there is excessive bleeding from the cord stump, pus-like drainage, or redness and swelling around the cord junction site.

Until the cord stump falls off, avoid clothing that is binding around the waist.

Do not immerse your baby in water for a bath until the stump has fallen off.

Never attempt to remove the stump. It must fall off naturally.

Diapering: Diapering may seem intimidating the first few days, but it is a skill soon mastered. Parents can choose between cloth and disposable diapers.

When Your Baby Develops a Diaper Rash

Most rashes occur because a baby’s skin is sensitive and becomes irritated by a wet or messy diaper. If your baby has a diaper rash, change wet diapers frequently and as soon as possible after bowel movements.

• Clean the affected diaper area with warm water only (no wipes on a newborn, but you can use them later).

• Over-the-counter creams or powders specifically prepared for this purpose and applied on dry skin will usually clear up a mild rash.

• If a rash is present, leave your baby un-diapered and exposed to air for 30-minute periods when possible.

If your baby is receiving antibiotics, you may notice a diaper rash suddenly appearing. That does not mean your baby is allergic to the antibiotic; rather, it probably is a natural response to the change in the content and pH of his stool, which causes irritation to the skin. Do not stop the antibiotic unless advised by the pediatrician to do so.

Call the pediatrician if:

• The rash continues or worsens for three days or longer.

• The skin is bleeding or has blistered areas.

• The area of the rash is swollen.

In these situations, over-the-counter creams and ointments will not help. Prescription medications will probably be necessary.

Bathing (See Bathtime Safety - Blog Post 6)

During the first couple of weeks stay mindful not to immerse Baby in a sink or tub until the cord stump has fallen off, usually between 10-14 days. Until then, sponge bathing is all that is needed. Here are some guidelines to follow.

Circumcision Care

Circumcision is almost as old as history itself. The practice was historically (though not exclusively) a Jewish rite. Today, medical experts and studies affirm that there are modest benefits to circumcision, although not all agree on the necessity of it. Evidence suggests that circumcision may decrease the risk of urinary tract infection and that it virtually eliminates the possibility of cancer of the penis. Circumcision for infants is not a traumatizing experience; it is a minor surgery. The discomfort felt will be no more rooted in his memory than being pricked in the heel during his PKU blood test (a phenylketonuria test, which verifies that your newborn baby has an important enzyme). A circumcision normally heals within four to seven days and needs routine cleaning during diaper changes:

Clean with a soft cloth and water; do not rub.

Apply a coat of Vaseline over the area of exposed tissue and cover with a gauze square. This protects the area from wetness and bacteria.

Replace at each diaper change until area is healed.

Call the pediatrician if there is excessive bleeding from the surgical site or if there is excessive swelling, redness, the presence of pus or drainage, or a foul odor.

Jaundice in Newborns

Jaundice is not a disease but a temporary condition characterized by a yellow tinge to the skin and eyes. The yellow comes from bilirubin (a bile pigment) in the blood and is usually easily controlled. If the condition appears more pronounced after the second day, frequent blood tests are taken and conservative treatment initiated.

Babies with moderately raised levels of bilirubin are sometimes treated with special fluorescent lights that help break down the yellow pigment. Additional fluid intake may also be part of the recommended treatment. In this case, your pediatrician may recommend other liquid supplements, although exclusive breastfeeding is usually the best way to correct this condition, even feeding as often as every 2 hours. Because bilirubin is eliminated in the stool, make sure your baby is having regular stools. A newborn with jaundice will tend to be sleepier than normal, so be sure to wake him for a feeding at least every 2½ to 3 hours.

Sick Baby Care

While a sick baby can foster insecurity in the parents, they gain a new appreciation for the medical professionals that serve their baby during this time. It is normal for a baby to be sick as many as seven to nine times within the first year. Prevention is the best care so do what you can to provide your baby with a clean, safe environment and a routine that provides regular sleep, play, and feeding. If you observe any of the following symptoms, however, call your pediatrician:

Rectal temperature over 100.4° F (38° C)

Excessive vomiting or green vomit.

Diarrhea, defined as three or more stools (watery or foul smelling) beyond what is normal for the baby and that continues for more than 48 hours.

Constipation, defined as stools that are hard and dry or no stools for 48 hours. Remember that breastfed babies over a month old may have only one to two stools per week because breastmilk is nearly 100% digested. This is why it is important to know what is normal for your baby.

Yellowish coloring of the skin and the whites of the baby’s eyes.

Baby is showing symptoms of dehydration. Similar to adults, babies become dehydrated when they do not receive enough liquids, but unlike adults, they cannot ask for or get a drink by themselves. In the first few weeks, babies may show signs of dehydration due to a breastfeeding problem. The warning signs include:

• Lack of wet or dirty diapers

• Dry tongue and mouth

• Lethargic or difficult to wake for feedings

• Weak suck or latching-on problems

• Feeding less than eight times in 24 hours

• Losing weight

  © 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Colic and Reflux and the Inconsolable Baby

BWS - 10

When a mother and father gaze upon the miracle of their newborn, it’s natural to feel a mix of awe and overwhelm. The early days of parenting come with so much to learn, and the weight of those first moments can feel heavy. Of course, a gentle, predictable routine can ease much of this anxiety because feeding routines bring a sense of order to your baby’s day, and in turn, it nurtures a quiet confidence in your heart as you begin this new chapter.

Yet, as we all know, life is rarely perfectly predictable. What do you do when your sweet baby doesn’t follow the routine and becomes fussy outside the usual times? Perhaps your little one cries for food, only to stop feeding after a few moments, refusing the bottle or breast. Maybe your baby arches their back, and discomfort clears on their face, but nothing seems to soothe them. Or perhaps, more concerning, your baby spits up what seems like the entirety of their meal every time and is waking from naps in visible discomfort. What should you do when your nurturing arms aren’t enough to ease their distress?

In Babywise Sleep Solutions’ Chapter Seven, we discussed the difference between normal and abnormal crying patterns. Some babies may fuss before feeding or while settling down for a nap. Many go through a fussy period at least once a day, often in the late afternoon, but otherwise, they spend their time in a relatively calm and peaceful state. These moments of fussiness are a normal part of infancy, something to be expected in those tender early months.

But for some parents, the challenges can run deeper. Imagine having a baby like little Asher or Ross, who showed all the signs of hunger, latched on to Mom, began to feed, and then abruptly stopped after just a few minutes. Crying soon followed, and they would refuse to nurse any longer. Exhausted, they would fall asleep, only to wake again 30 minutes later, hungry, and the cycle would begin anew. Or maybe your baby is like Caleb, who seemed inconsolable, fussing and crying before, during, and after every feeding, drawing up his tiny legs in pain. Some parents, like those of baby Micah, experienced the heartbreak of watching their little one vomit after every meal for six long months.

For these families, the cause of their baby’s distress wasn’t easy to uncover. It left them desperate and weary, their hearts aching with concern as they searched for answers. Yet, even in these challenging moments, you are not alone. We will explore these struggles together, offering understanding and guidance as you navigate this delicate time in your baby’s life.

Asher’s Story

According to Ashley, Asher’s mom, it happened at every feeding

“Asher showed all the normal hunger signals, began to nurse ferociously, and then would suddenly stop. He would pull away from me and just start screaming. I knew something was wrong, but what? I tried everything. I changed my diet, fed more often, fed less often, switched sides numerous times while nursing, and burped him often. Nothing helped. Sleep was not the best. Asher took very short naps, 30 minutes, if I could get him to sleep at all. At night he would wake four to five times. Nothing brought comfort to my son.”

Micah’s Story

Whitney provided a slightly different account of her son, Micah, but one just as stressful

“Forester, my firstborn, was a big spitter (soaked a burp cloth every feeding), but he was a happy spitter and a big baby (9 lbs. 11 oz./4.3 kgs at birth). He remained at the top of the growth charts, so I never thought twice about colic or reflux. After my second child, Micah, was born, I saw a similar pattern developing. By his second day of life, Micah was spitting up large amounts after each feed. At first, I just thought he was a big spitter like my firstborn, but by the end of Micah’s first week, my husband said, ‘This just cannot be normal.’ At two weeks Micah was spitting up 40-50 times a day. There were times when he spit up so much milk that I would wonder if I should feed him again because it looked like everything just came back up.

He remained on a 2-hour feeding routine for the first three months which wreaked havoc on his sleep cycles, and mine! I was discouraged and anxious. I remember being totally exhausted one night, crying at 2:00 a.m., thinking, ‘I’m never going to rest, and he is never going to sleep! By the time he stops spitting up, it is time to feed again, and we are going to start all over!’ I now realize that my first son, Forester, probably had a similar condition as a newborn.”

Ross’s Story

Sally, Ross’s mom, recalls “From the very beginning, we discovered that Ross had a pattern of spitting up during and after each meal. At three weeks, we noticed Ross had difficulty nursing and pulled off me and began crying during feedings. To say the least, feeding became a traumatic event for us both, as Ross would continually pull off, arch his back and cry, try to suck, and then pull off again. Although he slept fairly well, he was still waking at 3:00 a.m. or so at three months of age and had only moderate weight gain.”

Caleb’s Story

Caleb’s struggles were even more distressing. His mom, Stephanie, writes

“Although I had a c-section when Caleb was born, he was very healthy and weighed in at 6 1/2 pounds/3 kgs. Initially, he was cast as an “easy” baby. He nursed well, had a ravenous appetite and those first few naps were wonderful. But my peaceful assessment and my easy-going baby lasted only a few days.

“By the end of the first week, everything started going downhill and fast! Caleb was very fussy and always seemed to be in pain and distress. If I was lucky, he would sleep for an hour and a half at a stretch, but then he would wake up screaming, covered in vomit. At his two-week checkup, Caleb was weighed and measured, and I was told he was growing beautifully. He had grown from six and one-half pounds at birth to 9lbs/4 kgs. I relayed all of the problems Caleb was having to the doctor, but I was assured it was ‘just colic and a little bit of reflux.’ When I tried to insist it was more, I was told there was nothing to worry about because he was gaining weight beautifully.

Of course, everything was not fine. Caleb’s condition grew worse. During feedings he would arch his back and be as stiff as a board. Caleb kept his legs drawn up to his stomach and his arms clenched tightly to his sides. Changing, dressing, and bathing him were a chore due to his stiffness. His condition necessitated a visit to a gastroenterologist. After taking Caleb’s history, the gastroenterologist examined him and did an ultrasound of his abdomen. Based on the findings, he said that Caleb had a severe case of gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD).”

Understanding The Conditions

This Post addresses three medical conditions. While each condition has its own diagnosis, they are related symptomatically through crying and spitting up. The three conditions are:

1.  Colic

2.  Gastroesophageal reflux (GER)

3.  Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD)

We trust that by sharing these four examples, you will become proactive in seeking medical attention should your baby demonstrate any of the distress signs. With Asher, Micah, Ross, and Caleb, all four were gaining weight, but that did not mean everything was medically okay with them. No one knows a baby like his parents, and if you sense something is not right, for your peace of mind and your baby’s health, pursue medical advice until you are satisfied your baby’s condition is understood.

Crying and Colic

There is a big difference between a fussy baby and a colicky baby. Fussy babies have fussy times followed by relative peace and calm the rest of the day or night. The colicky baby seems irritable nearly all the time, day and night. Symptoms of colic include piercing cries combined with these signs of acute stomach distress: folding of the legs, flailing arms, inconsolable crying and passing gas. Although this list of symptoms makes colic sound like a digestive disorder, it is not.

Most theorists suggest that colic is the immaturity of a baby’s nervous system in processing the full range of stimuli common among newborns at birth. This condition affects about 20 percent of the infant population. It shows up usually between weeks two to four and generally ends by the third month. While there are no significant medical concerns associated with “true colic,” a term that indicates how easily the condition can be misdiagnosed, the main problem is the stress and anxiety it creates within the home. It is emotionally difficult to cope with the constant crying of an inconsolable baby. Close friends and extended family can really help by giving the frazzled parents short breaks during this temporary crisis.

What Can a Mother Do?

It would be wonderful if there were a medical cure for colic or some homespun remedy that could bring babies relief from their physical distress. However, to date, no such cure exists. But there is some encouraging news. Colic, while distressing to parents, is not hopeless, and babies do outgrow it. If your baby is showing signs of colic, here are some practical suggestions from some of our experienced mothers of colic babies.

One: Always consult your pediatrician to rule out any medical reasons for your baby’s excessive crying or spitting up. Ask your practitioner what might be helpful for your infant. Get a second opinion, if you sense your concerns are not being taken seriously.

Two: Remember that all babies are different and respond to different measures. Find out what works for your baby and stay with it. Some moms have found it helpful to wrap their newborns in swaddling cloths, while others find giving a warm bath helpful or placing the infant in a swing or near a vibrating dryer (not on the dryer). If you are bottle feeding your baby, try changing formula. Your pediatrician can advise you.

Three: A breastfeeding mom may find that certain foods in her diet trigger Baby’s discomfort. You can start by eliminating gas-producing foods (e.g., beans, broccoli, cauliflower, cabbage, onions and garlic) or any spicy foods, then dairy products, caffeine and alcohol. Be systematic so you can identify a particular food or type of food that may be causing problems for your baby. If food sensitivity is the issue, there will be a noticeable decrease in your baby’s colic-like symptoms within a couple of days. After a few weeks, gradually reintroduce individual items back into your diet and watch for a reaction.

Four: Avoid having your baby around secondhand smoke, especially when you have colic symptoms to deal with.

Five: It may help to give your baby a pacifier, especially after a feeding. Pacifiers bring comfort and help babies relax, although some babies show no interest in them. (Some research suggests that SIDS rates among infants who use a pacifier is significantly lower than those who do not.)

Six: Colicky babies need to be burped frequently. If you are bottle feeding, try a different bottle or nipple designed to help reduce the amount of air your baby swallows during a feeding. Some of the bottles made for this purpose are curved, vented, or have a collapsible bag inside. After each feeding, lay your baby across your knees, stomach down, and gently massage his back. The pressure of your knees against his abdomen may help relieve his discomfort.

Seven: Most newborns, especially those struggling with colic, have a low threshold for rapid movements, such as the flickering of a computer or telivion screens. A baby’s developing neurological system has difficulty processing those types of rapid light and sound changes. Such stimulation may further heighten an already stressful situation, for both baby and parent. Try offering your feedings in a soothing, calming environment. Keep the lights low and televison off.

Eight: At the other end of the spectrum are babies who are comforted by rhythmic motion, steady sound (commonly called white noise) or both. Some parents find securely placing their infant in the baby swing close to the white noise provides some temporary relief.

Taking Care of You

First-time moms and dads may find the early months of parenthood challenging beyond belief, especially if they have a colicky baby. One of the best things you can do for your baby is to take care of yourself. As much as reasonable, keep your baby’s routine going, but if you are feeling overwhelmed, take a break. Ask a family member or friend to take over for a while, even if it is only for an hour or two. While time seems to move slowly during stressful situations, keep in mind this hope-giving truth: your baby will outgrow his colic and life will return to normal.

Reflux and GERD

One of the biggest medical risks associated with colic is not the condition itself, but its symptoms because they mimic and often mask serious conditions such as milk-protein allergies, lactose intolerance, gastroesophageal reflux (GER), and gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD).

GERD is a serious digestive problem in newborns that is often missed because it is too quickly labeled as colic. It is not the same as GER (gastroesophageal reflux) or just plain reflux. GER causes asymptomatic spitting up and does not require medical treatment because the baby is growing well and is not fussy. GERD, however, causes intense pain and will lead to a feeding aversion if not treated. Caleb’s case manifested pain, inconsolable crying and excessive spitting up, although his weight gain was excellent; so, it took a while to diagnose the true condition. GERD requires medical attention, usually in the form of medication to decrease gastric-acid production; but it sometimes calls for surgical repair. The encouraging news is this condition is highly manageable.

Reflux/Gerd: What do we know?

Note: For purposes of this discussion, the term, “Reflux,” applies to both GER and GERD. Approximately 2½ million babies are born every day around the world, and many will experience a minor degree of reflux. This reflux decreases as the newborn’s digestive system matures. It is estimated that in the United States, three to five percent of all newborns have mild to severe reflux symptoms for the first few months of life. Reflux is usually due to an immature sphincter valve between the stomach and the esophagus. When working properly, the valve opens to allow us to swallow, burp or vomit and closes immediately afterward. Reflux occurs when the sphincter either stays relaxed or relaxes periodically, allowing food mixed with stomach acid to back up into the esophagus and throat, causing a burning sensation.

Reflux usually presents itself in the first few weeks of life. It often corrects itself, but in extreme cases, the infant may develop a feeding aversion because he associates feeding with pain. The condition can advance to the point where it causes significant weight loss or esophagitis, creating a condition known as “failure to thrive.” When reflux requires advanced medical attention beyond observation, the baby is said to have GERD.

Many babies with reflux are happy and thriving, despite their excessive spitting up. These little ones are sometimes called “happy spitters” or “happy chuckers,” and require little medical intervention. They are growing well, are not abnormally fussy and not in significant pain. They usually outgrow their reflux without complications. A smaller percentage of babies, however, like Asher, Micah, Ross, and Caleb, suffer with a type of severe infantile heartburn that requires medical attention. These are the GERD babies.

One of the most important indicators of GERD is an infant’s inability to be consoled. He is crying because he is in pain. Suppose GERD is the issue, when a physician prescribes a medication that blocks acid production in the stomach. In that case, you will see some improvement within two days and substantial improvement within 14 days. If no improvement takes place, the parents need to contact their healthcare provider immediately to find what will help their baby.

Several diagnostic tests are available to confirm the diagnosis of GERD. Your baby’s symptoms will direct the doctor in determining the most appropriate test. If you are uncomfortable with or do not understand the pros and cons of the prescribed treatment or tests, request a second opinion. Dealing with any form of reflux is emotionally stressful for parents. You must have confidence and understanding, so that you can wisely cooperate with your baby’s healthcare provider and bring relief and soothing comfort to your baby.

In addition to medication, there are aggravating foods for breastfeeding moms to review. Proper feeding positioning for the baby is essential. Holding a baby at a 30-degree angle (the most natural angle for breast or bottle-fed infants) will result in fewer reflux episodes than when a baby is held horizontally.

Colic, Reflux, and the PDF routine

Parents who have an infant with either colic or reflux (GER or GERD) may assume the PDF routine will not work for them, but the opposite is true. Preparation For Parenting will help you recognize progress and bring order to an otherwise chaotic situation. Although you may need to make adaptations to the PDF routine for your unique situation, you are still providing what is best for your baby and managing his particular needs. Let’s now consider how colic and reflux issues affect feedings, waketimes, and sleeping.

Challenges with the Routine

One: In general, try to keep your baby on a regular routine. With a reflux baby, consider feeding more often than the 2½ to 3 hours generally recommended (possibly every 2 hours). This may be easier on your baby since he will not try to get as much food each time. The pressure of a full stomach could worsen his reflux. Use routinely whatever time increment you find helpful to your baby.

Two: The basic principles of PDF remain the same, including the establishment of healthy feed, wake, and sleep cycles. A well-established sleep pattern can take longer to accomplish with reflux, but it will come. In Asher’s case, consistent, uninterrupted nighttime sleep was not achieved until he was six months old. It should be noted that some reflux babies begin sleeping through the night between 13-18 weeks.

Three: Keep Baby’s environment calm and quiet. Try wrapping him snuggly to minimize extra stimulation and stress. Hold him gently and avoid bouncing, jiggling or excessive back patting.

Four: Do not worry that your baby is not following the plan exactly like the book describes. Instead, learn to enjoy his uniqueness, in spite of your baby’s digestive condition.

Feeding Times/Waketimes

One: As a parent, avoid the two feeding extremes: letting your baby get too hungry and over-feeding him.

Two: Keep the feeding environment calm and relaxing. Turn off the television and any loud music (carries vibrations that some newborns find irritating).

Three: Try propping your baby in an upright position after each feeding for at least 30 minutes or elevating his crib mattress slightly (maximum of 30 degrees). This will help with digestion. Also remember, be sure to burp him frequently.

Four: If a particular feeding is dragging out longer than 45 minutes, either because he no longer seems interested, or is struggling due to discomfort, discontinue the feeding, burp well and then use recommendation of #3 above. It is better to let him wake earlier (but hungry) at his next feeding than to go at it for an hour just to get a full feeding. This will only exhaust parent and child.

Five: Some breastfeeding mothers have an overflowing supply of milk. Their babies will attempt to compensate by swallowing faster and gulping, taking in excessive air, which produces gas. That exacerbates the reflux condition. If this is your situation, allow gravity to help solve the problem. Either recline in a lounge chair or lie down propped on a pillow (so you are not completely reclining), and gravity will slow down the force of your letdown. Another technique is to use your index and middle fingers for a gentle scissors hold to control the initial flow of milk during your letdown. When your letdown begins, direct the initial spray into a towel and then bring your baby back to your breast.

Six: For babies diagnosed with reflux and spit up, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) suggests holding off offering an additional feed and instead wait until the next feeding.

Seven: It is sometimes suggested that bottle-fed babies who suffer from reflux may benefit from having their formula thickened with rice cereal (usually one tablespoon per one ounce/ 30 mls of formula. Here again, check with your pediatrician first.)

Eight: If your pediatrician recommends any medicine for your baby, ask about the possible side effects. Some medications can give babies stomach cramps, which may appear as colic.

Nine: When changing your baby, take care not to pull the diaper too tight. That can place additional pressure on his stomach.

Sleeping

Sleep can seem impossible when a baby is waking up screaming 35 to 45 minutes into his sleep cycle. Here are some practical suggestions to consider.

One: You might try swaddling your baby when putting him down for a nap. If there is excessive crying, a pacifier will sometimes help him settle, or simply changing his sleep position.

Two: If your baby is habitually waking up 45 minutes into his nap, screaming in pain and inconsolable, consider going in after 40 minutes and gently rocking him through the cycle so he does not become over-stimulated by his crying.

Three: For the baby over three months, try using a pacifier immediately upon waking; or if he is fully awake, pick him up and comfort him as best you can. Sit, walk or rock him until he displays signs of tiredness, and then try putting him back down.

Crying

One: Typical signs of reflux are crying through feedings, not latching on, very small feedings and crying until exhausted. Feed a very young baby immediately upon waking. Avoid letting your reflux baby get into a full cry.

Two: Whenever a baby is showing signs of stress during a feeding, stop, soothe and relax your baby, and then continue feeding.

Three: Since reflux infants tend to be more comfortable in an upright position, they generally object to being laid down, especially on their backs. While the AAP recognizes that the back position may increase crying with a reflux baby, the organization generally recommends the back sleeping position because of SIDS statistics. You will need to discuss this matter with your pediatrician for what is best for your baby’s situation.

Four: Remember to take one day at a time, focusing on the long-term goal of establishing healthy feed/wake/sleep cycles. Some days will go well, and other days you will have to regard as stepping stones toward the big picture. All of parenting is a process, but especially with a reflux baby; so be patient with yourself and baby. It will probably take a few extra weeks before he stabilizes his routine, but he will get there.

Whatever Happened To The Babies?

From Ashley’s Journal:

“Once Asher was diagnosed with reflux, we knew what we were up against and that made caring for the little guy that much easier. Asher improved greatly with the help of medication, and by six months his acid reflux problem was gone. It was then he began to sleep through the night. (He was night trained in three days.) Once he started sleeping through the night, he simultaneously developed a much better napping routine. He eventually moved to two naps a day, about 1½ hours each (morning and afternoon). Today, at two years of age, we constantly have people amazed at how well Asher goes to sleep at night. He still sleeps 12 hours and naps 2 to 3 hours.”

From Stephanie’s Journal:

“Because of his healthy weight gain, Caleb’s pediatrician chose medication over any invasive procedures. The meds worked wonderfully. His reflux improved beautifully, and most significant of all, his little body began to relax. After a week of this, Caleb went to bed and slept 12 hours through the night, and he has continued to do so ever since.”

From Whitney’s Journal:

“At his three-month checkup, Micah was placed on Prevacid® and that fixed the problem. He transitioned to his crib and began sleeping through the night. At 15 months of age, we dropped the medication completely. His 18-month checkup was encouraging. For the first time, Micah was above the 50 percent range. In hindsight, I was discouraged by how many people told me, ‘All you really have is a laundry problem.’ Not true! The information I wished I had beforehand was the best way to continue working on a routine with a reflux infant without thinking he should be sleeping through the night at eight weeks. I learned reflux babies are delayed in this category, and that is not a reflection on either the baby, the parent or Preparation For Parenting; it is just a normal outcome for a reflux baby.”

From Sally’s Journal:

“We took a list of symptoms to our pediatrician, who immediately suspected reflux. She prescribed Zantac®. We saw a significant difference in Ross in two days. As he began feeding better, his day and night sleep also improved. Ross continued nursing for 13 months. Once he started drinking from a cup, we stopped the medicine. The reflux was gone.”

Summary

Caring for a baby with colic, reflux or  GERD, is a major task that can be very stressful for the entire family. For that reason, parents should get medical help for their baby as soon as possible. This is a time to bring in family and friends, who can provide assistance with home care and meals.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Naptime Basics (Part Three) - Sleep Challenges and Solutions

BWS - 09

Below are several causes of sleep disturbance, along with an expanded explanation of many of the various sleep challenges noted in the previous blog. This is list two, note in our previous blog.  

1. Baby is hungry because he needs more milk calories in a 24-hour period.

Explanation/Recommendation: Whether breast or formula feeding, a baby’s growth necessitates more calories. While this does not always signal the start of solids, it may signal a need for more feedings (if breastfeeding) or more ounces (if offering formula). Hunger can disrupt established nap and nighttime sleep routines. Check with your baby’s pediatrician for literature relating to the number of ounces a baby needs at each week or month of life.

2.  Baby is starting a growth spurt.

Explanation/Recommendation: Growth spurts will disrupt Baby’s naptimes for the length of the spurt, which may be one to four days. When a growth spurt occurs, feed as often as your baby needs, but try to maintain the feed-wake-sleep cycles as best you can. The day after the growth spurt ends, your baby will take longer-than-normal naps for a few days. That is because growth spurts are as exhausting for the Baby as for the Mom. A growth spurt is a biological process in which a baby requires additional calories for a specific growth need, most likely to restore depleted energy to the cells. Your primary concern is to provide the extra calories your baby needs. (Please review the Growth Spurt section in Chapter Four.)

3. Baby is ready to start solid foods.

Explanation/Recommendation: For the baby with a well-established nighttime sleep pattern, any abnormal waking between five and six months of age or waking early during naps might also signal that more nutrition is required during the day. Babies are highly individual when it comes to showing a readiness for solid foods. One baby might show signs at four months, while another shows no signs of readiness until six months. Generally, babies usually start between four and six months of age. However, some research suggests that holding off solids to five or six months may decrease the possibility of food allergies. Please note that the research does not suggest that offering solids at four months will create food allergies; rather, some babies have an underdeveloped ability to digest solid foods, which is reflected by food allergies. The AAP leans toward six months before starting solids, but most grandmothers will tell you any time between four and six months is appropriate if your baby shows all the signs. Your baby’s pediatrician or family practitioner will direct you based on your child’s unique nutritional needs and readiness cues.

4. Baby is uncomfortable because he is getting sick, is teething, has a slight fever, starts an ear infection, etc.

Explanation/Recommendation: It is a little scary! Your baby wakes early from his nap and cries as if in pain, but you do not know why. First, you check his forehead for any indication of a fever. The ears and nose are next. No redness is good news, so you examine the baby’s mouth for an emerging new tooth. Nothing there. Examination time is over. You assume it is a sleep issue.

Not so fast! The sudden and unexplainable cry has a reason, and you must figure out why as a parent. If you have not already, get into the habit of checking your baby all over once a day, including fingers and toes. Certainly look for the bug bites, which often appear as a red skin bump. There is also a condition, though relatively under-reported, called “toe-tourniquet” syndrome. A single strand of hair, usually Mom’s, or a fiber from a carpet or blanket where the baby was playing, somehow gets wrapped around a toe or finger. Although hardly noticeable, it eventually begins to tighten and cut off circulation to the appendage, causing swelling, inflammation, and pain. The problem is often missed because the baby wears a sock or sleeper. While this may not explain every sudden and unexplainable cry or why your baby is waking early from his naps, it does alert you to the need for a daily “once over” of your baby’s body.

5. Baby’s tummy is troubling him because he has a mild or delayed case of reflux.

Explanation/Recommendation: While you can read more about reflux in Chapter Eight, it is important to understand that reflux symptoms may not be present at birth and may not show up for several weeks. It is estimated that in the United States, three to five percent of all newborns have mild to severe reflux symptoms for the first few months of life. Reflux results from an immature sphincter valve where the esophagus connects with the stomach. When working correctly, it opens to allow us to swallow, burp or vomit, then closes immediately afterward. Reflux occurs when the sphincter stays relaxed or relaxes periodically, allowing food mixed with stomach acid to back up into the esophagus and throat, causing pain. This condition is called heartburn in the adult world.

If your baby is troubled by reflux, you can count on it showing up throughout the day, not just at naptime. We have a little friend named Micah who provides an example of this. After three weeks, a mild case of reflux began to manifest itself. To counter its effects, his parents did two things: They kept him upright for a short time following each feeding and elevated his crib's head by two inches, allowing gravity to prevent stomach acids from moving back into Micah’s esophagus while he was sleeping. Because this was a mild case of reflux, these solutions worked. For more severe cases, medication may be necessary.

6. Your baby is having an ongoing allergic reaction to a new baby food.

Explanation/Recommendation: One basic rule of introducing solids is to begin with one item at a time, waiting three to five days before introducing another new food type to see if your baby develops an allergic reaction. Sequential introduction of food items allows you to monitor your baby’s reaction so proper nutritional adjustments can be made if needed. For example, your baby might do fine with yellow squash but have a reaction to peas. Tummy discomfort, diarrhea, and even rashes are common symptoms of food allergies and can also affect naps and nighttime sleep. Vomiting, while rare, is a more serious indicator that the baby is having a reaction. The bottom line? Never introduce multiple food types simultaneously so you will not have to guess which food caused the reaction, should one occur.

When introducing cereal into your baby’s diet, begin with the morning meal. If, by any chance, your baby does have an intestinal reaction, it will be noticed and should be over by the end of the day. Starting a new food at noon or at dinner risks pushing the reaction to the middle of the night when sleep disturbances are more difficult to discern.

Finally, before starting solids, check with immediate and extended family members to find out if there is a history of food allergies. Knowing whether allergies run in the family gives you a big advantage. If there is a history on either side, a higher probability exists that your little one will be challenged by food allergies. This is good information to have. If it happens, at least you are not caught off guard.

7. Baby is starting a sleep/nap transition because he is extending his nighttime sleep, affecting daytime naps.

Explanation/Recommendation: When a baby begins to extend his sleep at night, such as going from 10 to 12 hours, this naturally reduces the time the baby sleeps during the day. This reduction usually shows up at naptime (on rare occasions, it can show up at 3:00 a.m., when the baby wakes and wants to play). In this case, the baby is not adding or subtracting hours of sleep; he is rearranging when his sleep occurs. However, as Baby grows, he will begin to subtract hours because his body will not allow him to over-sleep.

8. Baby is getting too much sleep and needs to subtract sleep hours.

Explanation/Recommendation: While sleep is very important to a baby’s development and overall behavioral performance, there are limits to the amount of sleep a baby needs at each stage of growth. The “sleep center” in a baby’s brain will automatically send an “awake signal” if too much sleep occurs in a 24-hour period. When he reaches this level of growth, he will begin to subtract hours of sleep. Normally, babies do not subtract hours from nighttime sleep but from daytime sleep. Correspondingly, this means waketimes are extending, and the number of naps decreases during the day.

9.  Baby is hungry because Mom’s milk supply has gradually decreased.

Explanation/Recommendation: When it comes to a drop in Mom’s milk supply, the decrease is usually gradual, and correspondingly her baby gradually shifts nap duration. Baby might start waking just 15 to 30 minutes early and then 30 to 45 minutes or 60 minutes early. Most Moms can add a feeding or two and increase their milk supply.

However, there is a very small percentage of breastfeeding moms who are not able to sustain their milk supply during the day, even after trying every reasonable lactation suggestion offered. Sometimes, during the long stretch of nighttime sleep, Mom can produce a sufficient quantity of milk for the morning feed, but she cannot sustain the necessary production throughout the day. The end result shows up at various sleep times. Possible causes for lower milk production include:

• Mom is not offering enough feedings in a 24-hour period.

• Mom is fatigued because she offers too many feedings (or is cluster-feeding).

• Mom’s schedule is too busy (i.e. she is not getting sufficient rest).

• Mom is not eating properly or not taking in sufficient calories or liquids.

• Mom is on a lactation-suppressing medication.

• Mom is not able to keep up with the baby’s nutritional needs.

Once Mom discovers the probable cause for the decrease in her milk supply, she should take corrective action on any cause that she can control or influence. If she determines that she is not able to provide her baby adequate nutrition through exclusive breastfeeding, even after making all the proper nursing adjustments, then she has two choices. Continue to nurse and supplement with formula, or completely switch over to formula. Either way, the most important aspect is whether the baby is receiving adequate nutrition for healthy growth, and that is what Mom’s decision should be based on.

10.  Baby has a reaction to a new medication Mom is taking.

Explanation/Recommendation: Most medications prescribed to breastfeeding mothers are safe for the nursing infant. However, certain medications can potentially become a source of discomfort, impacting a baby’s sleep. If Mom suspects a link between her medication and her baby’s irritability, there are several factors to consider.

First, a mother should not assume that a medication safely taken during pregnancy will always be safe for a nursing baby. Second, Mom should check the prescription dosage with her doctor or pharmacist. Is it possible to reduce the dosage or substitute another drug that has fewer side effects for the baby? Third, what time of day is Mom taking her medication? Is it possible to take it right after the baby’s last feeding of the night so her body can metabolize most of the medication during her nighttime sleep, which hopefully will be 8 to 10 hours before her baby’s next meal? In the end, Mom must weigh the benefits of taking her medication in light of the possibility that the medication is having a negative impact on her baby. Getting advice from a medical expert should be considered.

11. An over-abundant milk supply is providing too much lactose for baby.

Explanation/Recommendation: Most breastfeeding concerns are associated with mothers who are not producing enough breastmilk. However, in rare cases, some mothers produce too much milk, which sets in motion a ripple effect that shows up at naptime. When a mother’s milk-producing glands make and store more milk than her baby needs, the foremilk/hindmilk volumes change correspondingly. While the foremilk/hindmilk nutrient ratios remain the same, the total quantities in each breast are higher. When more foremilk is available to a hungry baby, more lactose (milk sugar) is ingested, and that is when the problem starts.

Healthy babies do not have a problem with processing normal levels of lactose, but ingesting a large volume will overpower their digestive tracks because they do not have enough lactase (digestive enzyme) to break down all the lactose. Excessive lactose causes significant discomfort from gas build-up. Green watery stools are a common symptom of this condition. 

Let’s do the math on this. We will assume that Baby is at an age when he should be taking a total of 5 ounces of milk at each feeding (2½ ounces from each breast). However, Mom produces 6 to 8 ounces of milk at each feeding, which proportionally increases lactose availability during nursing. Baby starts on one side, takes 3-4 ounces, switches breasts, but then becomes satiated with 2 ounces of mostly foremilk from the second side. Since foremilk is high in lactose but lower in fat than hindmilk, the result is too much lactose entering the baby’s digestive system causing stomach pain, watery stools, and ultimately leading to disruptions at Baby’s naptimes.

A downward cycle follows: naps become shorter, Baby begins to feed less vigorously, and the lactose cycle repeats itself. Possible solution? Pumping some milk from both breasts just prior to feeding might help remedy the problem. That will remove some of the foremilk so when Baby feeds, he will receive a closer to normal foremilk/hindmilk ratio. Unfortunately, trial and error is the only way to discover the right amount to pump.

12.  Baby’s waketime is too short.

Explanation/Recommendation: There will always be days when a baby’s routine will have some variance impacting the length of waketimes. However, if a baby’s waketime is routinely too short for his age, then naptimes will be disrupted.

13.  Baby’s waketimes are over-stimulating or too long.

Explanation/Recommendation: When searching for the solution to naptime challenges, parents often overlook the quality of the waketime that preceded the nap. Remember, everything is connected. Waketimes affect naps just like naps affect waketimes. Over-tired and over-stimulated babies become hyper-alert, fighting off sleep through crying. If this is a regular problem, shortening your baby’s waketime by 15-minute increments might help.

Also, be aware of the types of activities you and your baby are involved in. Are you having too many visitors drop by who have an irresistible urge to entertain your baby? Was your baby being exposed to Dad’s loud friends as they sat watching a sporting event? Might Mom be on the go too much? When Baby is along for the ride, the coming and going, the new sights and sounds, and the absence of predictability all work against good nap behavior. That is because catnaps in a car seat are no substitute for a full nap in the crib. An occasional nap in the car seat will not cause trouble, but it should not be the norm, especially during the first six months of your baby’s life.

14. First feeding of the day has too much flexibility.

Explanation/Recommendation: As previously noted, it is important that the first feeding of the day stays fairly consistent (within 20 to 30 minutes.) Otherwise, each day will be a different rhythm, which works against stabilizing the baby’s hunger metabolism. This will eventually affect the length of baby’s naptime.

15. Baby is not being exposed to adequate amounts of daylight.

Explanation/Recommendation: Natural light is important to help babies regulate their circadian clock. This is the inner clock, the biological time-keeping system that regulates daily activities, such as sleep and wake cycles. We recommend that, as soon as your baby awakens in the morning, you take him to a room filled with daylight (although he does not need to be in direct sunlight). Natural light, along with the first feeding of the day, will help establish his circadian rhythm and keep them consistent. Routine helps facilitate this amazing function possessed by all humans.

16. Baby’s room is not dark enough.

Explanation/Recommendation: This is one of the most overlooked reasons for the sudden occurrence of a baby waking early and one of the easiest to fix. While newborns can sleep just about anywhere and under any conditions, the “light sensitivity” changes after three months of age. The morning sun is on one side of the house, but the afternoon sun is on the other. Depending on the baby’s room's direction, the sun’s light can impact a baby’s naps. Like most adults, babies tend to sleep better and longer if the room is darkened. Shades or curtains are the simple solution.

17. Baby is over-stimulated in the crib because a wind-up toy/ mobile was turned on when he was put down for a nap.

Explanation/Recommendation: All those fun baby gifts Mom and Dad want to use right away can be a problem. Why? Newborns are not ready to appreciate crib gear yet because of their eyesight. We recommend keeping the crib mobiles in their boxes before four months of age. Put them over the playpen rather than the crib when they come out. Mobiles are entertaining, but they can become a source of over-stimulation when set up too early and activated just before naptime. Some babies cannot neurologically handle particular types of stimulation created by movement and sound. Even the flickering of light from a television can over-stimulate a baby.

For example, Mom checks her social media feeds in a darkened room while nursing and notices her baby drifting off to sleep. She thinks he must be tired; however, in this case, the baby is shutting down neurologically, a mechanism by which a baby’s body protects itself. Thirty minutes later, the baby wakes, and Mom interprets this as a sleep problem when it is actually a problem brought on by over-stimulation. The problem here is the “blue light” emitting from her phone screen disrupts the production of melatonin, which is necessary for establishing and maintaining natural sleep-wake cycles. The “blue light” is not only affecting Baby, but Mom’s ability to sleep well.

18.  Your four to six-month-old baby is waking in response to sounds associated with pleasure.

Explanation/Recommendation: This condition is created when two-time elements cross. The baby’s circadian clock has him moving out of deep sleep into active sleep close to the time a familiar sound occurs each day. He can associate sounds with activities and people as he approaches four months. Once he makes the association, he becomes more alert, and the sound can trigger an awakening mode. While many babies will fall back to sleep, others are ready to fight off sleep in exchange for the next big adventure.

It could be the familiar sound of school bus brakes or a garage door opening. Both signal the arrival of someone, perhaps an entertaining sibling or a fun-loving Dad. You can do very little about the school bus brakes except to substitute some white noise during the naptime affected. Dad can park the car in the driveway and find a less disturbing way to enter the house. Every home has its own peculiar sounds that become part of a baby’s subconscious, especially if the sound precedes pleasure. It is as if a bell goes off in Baby’s head, and suddenly he is ready to party!

19. Unknown: What does this mean? Simply a reason exists, but it is so unique to your baby’s situation that it is not easily duplicated by other babies.

Explanation/Recommendation: It is both amazing and helpful to realize that the simplest things can get overlooked when searching for a sleep/nap solution. One mother reported her search ended when she entered her baby’s room after he fell asleep and started sitting through his nap. She was unsure what she was looking for but discovered something she never expected. Just about 35 minutes into his nap, a beam of sunlight shining down onto her baby’s face began to appear. In this case, the unknown factor was tied to the earth’s rotation, continually changing the sun's angle. In tracing the sunbeam back to its source, Mom discovered the sun’s rays reflected off a piece of metal flashing on her neighbor’s roof. While the sun’s impact at that location lasted only ten minutes, it was enough to wake the baby. Mom hung a towel in the corner of the window during naptime, solving the problem.

If the cause of your baby’s naptime disturbance falls into the category of “unknown,” Keep looking for clues, ask questions, or invite an experienced PDF mom over for part of the day to observe you and your baby. A fresh set of eyes can never hurt if stumped with a nap challenge.

Summary of Waking Early

If your baby wakes early out of a sound sleep with a strong cry, consider whether the cause relates to Baby, Mom, waketime, or the sleep environment. This phenomenon has become known as the 45-Minute Intruder and can visit your baby at any time, but it usually shows up after eight weeks of age and peaks around six months of age. It might stick around a day or two or decide to take up residence for a week.

If you have ruled out the simple explanations, we suggest you begin by treating the sleep intruder as a hunger problem. Try feeding your baby first. If he shows no interest in feeding or does not feed well, you have just ruled out hunger as the cause. But if he does take a full feeding, you have narrowed the problem to a feeding issue. This could indicate that he is starting a growth spurt, or there is a decrease in your milk supply or the quality of your milk.

If this is not a feeding issue, then go through the rest of the items in List two. The key to fixing the problem is to identify the source of the problem and then work toward a solution. Even if you cannot identify the source, the problem tends to be temporary and usually fixes itself.

Finally, be aware that some sleep advocates advise moms to keep their babies on fixed schedules, even if their babies wake early from their naps. Their advice is to allow the baby to “cry it out” until the next feeding, but this ignores the potential needs of the baby. A hungry baby should constantly be fed! Withholding food is never a way to fix a sleep problem.

Summary: Waketime and Naps

Waketime will become an increasingly important part of your baby’s day because it is a learning time. There is a balance, however, that parents must stay mindful of. Over-stimulating a baby during waketime impacts the next set of feedings and naptimes. Remember, everything is connected.

Everyone in the house wins when parents help their babies by establishing healthy feed-wake-sleep patterns. When there are several disruptions in your baby’s feeding or waketime routine, there will be corresponding changes in his sleep patterns. Stay on top of this by being as consistent as possible with mealtime and age-appropriate waketimes.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Naptime Basics (Part Two) - The 45 Minute Nap Intruder

BWS - 08

For expecting parents and those cradling their precious newborns, the thought of a baby waking early from a nap may seem far off, not a concern for today. But soon enough, this series of posts will become a trusted companion—one that mothers and fathers will turn to many times. Here, we touch on the delicate challenges of sleep and naps, not the initial task of establishing a gentle rhythm for your baby, but the surprising moments when that well-practiced routine suddenly falters. Rest assured, the challenge is real, but the support awaits you just a few pages ahead. Before we dive into solutions, let me share a little story about “Switch 26.”

From 1991 to 1994, Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo hosted a live radio show called Parenting on the Line. Their broadcast studio was a complex web of satellite feeds, transmitters, and a bewildering array of dials and buttons, most of which they had no knowledge of. Thankfully, their trusty engineer knew every switch by heart. One day, panic set in as the countdown to their show ticked down from 60 seconds, they realized their microphones weren’t working. At the 40-second mark, they exchanged anxious glances with the engineer, who hurried over, eyes scanning the array of tiny switches. His focus landed on Switch 26, and with a flick of his finger, the microphones came to life just in time.

The Ezzos never forgot the confusion and uncertainty of that moment, the sudden jolt when everything familiar feels like it’s slipping away. Parenting, too, has its bewildering moments. Imagine the dismay when your baby wakes early from what should have been a long, peaceful nap, disrupting a routine you thought was secure. Like that elusive Switch 26, the solution is often simple, though finding it may not always be so easy. But dear mother, with a bit of patience and understanding, you will soon learn where to look.

What if there was a gentle guide to help parents uncover the reason behind their baby’s interrupted naps? For Babywise moms and dads, the good news is that such a guide does exist. In the following pages, you'll find a thoughtful list of possible reasons why your little one may wake early from their naps. At first glance, this list might feel a bit overwhelming as you see the many potential causes of nap disturbances. But don’t worry, the number of possibilities quickly narrows once you consider key details, such as your baby’s age and whether they are primarily nourished by breastmilk, formula, or solid foods.

You'll also want to think about the nature of the disruption. Does it happen during every nap or only at certain times, like morning or afternoon? Is your baby waking only during naps, or are they also waking during the night? Is it a daily challenge, or does it occur every few days? By paying attention to these patterns, you unravel the mystery behind the early wake-ups.

Of course, this chapter will be most helpful if your baby has already developed a strong foundation of healthy sleep habits. We assume your little one is on a well-established 3-4 hour feed-wake-sleep routine, is sleeping through the night for at least 8 hours, and is enjoying naps that last around 1½-2 hours. These are typical Babywise milestones. So, when your baby wakes early from a nap, it stands out as something unexpected, something worth exploring.

Finding the Root of the Problem
We’ve all experienced the frustration of our internet going out. We wonder, is the issue with our laptop, the wireless router, a loose connection in the modem, or something down the line with the service provider? While the goal is simply to get back online, we have to first find the source of the problem.

Similarly, when a baby’s nap is interrupted, the cause could stem from many sources. It might be something baby-related, but it could also be connected to mom’s diet, the activities during waketime, or the sleep environment itself. Identifying the source of your baby’s nap disturbance is the first step to finding a solution.

We’ve divided the list into four categories to guide you through this process. Some causes are straightforward and have simple fixes, like a wet diaper or a trapped burp. Others are more subtle and require a bit of investigation.

For simplicity, we offer two lists here, and in the upcoming blogs, we’ll delve deeper into each one. The first list gives a broad overview of common reasons why babies wake early, whether a few times a month or a few times a day.

The second list (next blog,) explains causes that impact more than just the occasional nap. These are marked with an asterisk (*), indicating areas that may need more attention. By working through these lists, you and your baby will move closer to peaceful naps and restful days.

List One

Sleep Challenges Related to Baby

Here are some potential baby-related contributors to Baby waking early:

Baby is hungry because:

1. He did not take a full feeding at his previous feeding.

2. He needs more “milk” calories in a 24-hour period.*

3. He is starting a growth spurt.*

4. He is ready to start solid foods.*

Baby is uncomfortable because:

1. He is getting sick, has a slight fever, is teething, is starting an ear infection, etc.

2. He has an insect bite or hair twisted around a toe (tourniquet syndrome).*

3. He is too hot or too cold.

4. He has a diaper rash.

Baby’s tummy is troubling him because:

1. He has a mild or delayed case of reflux.*

2. He is having an allergic reaction to a new baby food.*

3. He is struggling with a bowel movement.

4. He needs a burp.

Baby woke-up because:

1. He startled himself (startle reflex).

2. He rolled over and does not know how to roll back.

3. He lost his pacifier and cannot resettle without it.

Baby is starting a sleep/nap transition because:

1. He is extending his nighttime sleep, affecting daytime naps.*

2. His body does not require as much sleep in a 24-hour period, thus impacting naps.

Sleep Challenges Related To Mom

Baby is hungry because:

1. The previous feeding proved to be inadequate.

2. Mom’s milk supply has gradually decreased.*

Mom’s diet is affecting the nursing baby.

Baby has a reaction to a new medication Mom is taking.*

The nursing baby is receiving too much lactose from Mom.*

Mom’s schedule was rushed, so she did not allow enough time for her baby to receive a full feeding.

Sleep Challenges Related to Activities

Previous waketime was too short.*

Previous waketime was over-stimulating to baby because:

1. The waketime was too long, thus promoting fatigue rather than sleepiness.

2. The waketime activity was too over-stimulating (e.g. placing baby in front of TV).*

3. Baby’s overall routine has too much flexibility (e.g., Mom is running too many errands, and Baby is catching catnaps in the car).

First feeding of the day has too much flexibility.*

The three activities of Baby’s day are out of order. Mom has baby on wake-feed-sleep schedule instead of feed-wake-sleep schedule.

Sleep Challenges Related to the Environment

Baby is not being exposed to an adequate amount of daylight.  Natural light helps babies regulate their circadian clock.*

Baby’s room is not dark enough.*

Baby is over-stimulated in the crib because of wind-up toys that were turned on when he was put down for his nap.*

When your baby reaches four to six months of age, he could be waking up in response to familiar sounds in the home.*

Unknown: What does this mean? Simply that a reason exists, but it is so unique to your baby’s situation that it is not easily duplicated by other babies.*

Now that we have reviewed nap challenges initiated by the Baby, Mom, Activities, and environmental influences, we can expand this conversation in the next posting by reviewing some of the naptime challenges and possible explanations with suggested solutions.

Naptime Basics (Part One)

BWS - 07

The gentle rhythm of sleep is one of the most precious gifts you can offer your baby, and it begins to shape their life from the very first days. Sleep isn’t just about rest; it nurtures growth, soothes the little one’s mind, and helps them find a sense of calm in this new world. As a mother, you will quickly learn that those frequent newborn naps are opportunities not only for your baby to recharge but also for you to guide them toward the rhythms of sleep that will carry them through their first year and beyond.

In those early days, when your baby naps throughout the day, you’ll have the chance to gently introduce the concept of scheduled sleep. But experienced mothers know that these sweet naps can often be interrupted by all forms of unexpected and usually unpredictable variables like hunger, discomfort, or simply the wonder of discovering a new day.

Here lies a quiet paradox. You may find that helping your baby sleep eight hours through the night can come more easily than protecting the precious tranquility of a two-hour daytime nap. While the night’s longer rest is shaped by deep, bio-neurologic connections that allow your baby to settle into sleep, daytime naps face a host of small but potent disruptions. These little disturbances, like soft breezes that stir a calm sea, can make maintaining a smooth naptime routine challenging.

In the next few posts, we will explore the many factors that influence naptime, from your baby’s growing awareness of the world to the subtleties of their daily needs. But first, let’s talk about expectations, what can you, as a mother, anticipate during those naptimes, especially if you’re following a PDF (Parent-Directed Feeding) approach?

Sleep and Nap Summary

During the first four weeks, you may not yet actively begin sleep training, but you will be laying a gentle foundation by establishing a rhythm of feeding, waking, and sleeping. This is a passive way of guiding your baby toward healthy sleep habits, and it will set the stage for the weeks and months to come.

As the months unfold, you will see the ebb and flow of nap and wake times change, but understanding these patterns can help you confidently navigate this journey. Below, you’ll find a summary of what to expect during that precious first year, when each nap becomes an opportunity to rest and grow, both for your baby and for you as a mother discovering the quiet beauty of these shared moments.

In these times, remember that every nap is a step toward your child’s future, and in guiding them, you are also embracing the tender act of nurturing their heart and mind. The chart below is a general sleep guide for the first year. Like most of our guidelines, the averages are based exclusively on the Babywise infant population.

  Weeks Time Spent in Sleep           Number of Naps

    1 - 2 17-19 hours, including        5-6 naps per day

    3 - 5 16-18 hours, including        5-6 naps per day

    6 - 7 15-18 hours, including        4-6 naps per day

    8 - 12 14-17 hours, including        4-5 naps per day

  13 - 15 13-17 hours, including        3-4 naps per day

  16 - 24 13-16 hours, including        3-4 naps per day

  25 - 38 13-15 hours, including        2-3 naps per day

  39 - 52 12-15 hours, including           2 naps per day

Naps and Crying

Here’s what you can hold close to your heart: under normal circumstances, a few minutes of crying, 10, 15, or even 20, has limited, if any, adverse side effects compared to the offset benefits derived from healthy sleep patterns. It won’t diminish the countless moments of tenderness you’ve shared, the smiles, the snuggles, the gentle whispers that fill their world with love. Those moments are the foundation of your baby’s security and are far more substantial than a short period of fussing. A bit of crying doesn’t erase that; it doesn’t mean you’ve failed to protect your child’s happiness or well-being.

In fact, constantly preventing all crying, though well-meaning, can lead to more frustration, for both you and your baby. Babies need the space to express themselves, and sometimes that comes in the form of crying. It’s part of their journey to learn how to soothe themselves and how to find comfort within. This is especially true during naptime when the world quiets and your baby is learning the rhythms of rest. When they are truly tired, the crying often doesn’t last long, though it may feel like an eternity to you in the moment.

It’s so hard, I know, to hear those cries. It’s even harder to make the choice to allow them when your every instinct is to step in. But having the right perspective can help soften those moments. You are not letting your baby cry for no reason. You are guiding them towards something essential, healthy sleep habits that will serve them for a lifetime. These tears, in the context of sleep training, are not meaningless. They are part of a process that will help your baby learn to rest well, find comfort in sleep, and wake up with energy, joy, and cognitive alertness.

Think of these small crying moments as tiny steps toward something more significant. A well-rested baby is a happy baby who can greet the day with bright eyes, a smile, and a readiness to explore the world. They will learn to fall asleep peacefully and wake up content, and that is a gift for you both. It’s a small trade, a few tears now for the larger joy of a child who can sleep soundly and rise with happiness.

So, take heart, dear mother. In these moments, you are not just hearing cries, you are helping your baby grow, teaching them resilience, and offering them the lifelong gift of restful, peaceful sleep. And that, in itself, is an act of love.

The Fatigued Baby

The signs of infant fatigue are subtle yet distinct, different from the gentle tiredness that a baby can recover from with a good nap or a night’s sleep. Fatigue is more complex and can disrupt your baby’s natural sleep cycles, calling for extra care and tenderness. As a mother, it’s easy to feel the weight of this challenge. You might try to keep your baby awake, hoping they’ll tire themselves into sleep, or perhaps feel helpless as your attempts to soothe seem to only add to the distress. But know this: fatigue isn’t something to be brushed aside. It’s a delicate sleep challenge that requires gentle attention.

There are two things every mother hopes for a baby who sleeps peacefully through naps and one who rests in the comfort of their crib. Yet, when signs of fatigue emerge, sometimes we must set aside those hopes temporarily, putting our baby’s deeper needs first.

Fatigue in your baby is not unlike what we, as adults, feel when exhaustion overtakes us to the point where even sleep becomes elusive. It interrupts their natural rhythm, pulling them from the restful flow between active and relaxed sleep. Often, it results from disruptions to their routine, especially when nap times have been irregular over a few days. In moments like these, your focus turns to the heart of the issue, helping your baby return to their natural sleep-wake cycle with as little stress as possible.

If you sense your little one is caught in this pattern of fatigue, the first step is to create a calm, comforting space where sleep can come easily. This may mean letting go of rigid expectations for a short while. You could settle into a cozy chair, cradle your baby in your arms, and let them nap there for a day or two. Let their sleep come naturally in the warmth and comfort of your embrace. By the third day, you can begin gently transitioning them back to their crib for naps. This small shift helps restore your baby’s sleep without creating a long-term habit, it’s simply a pause in routine, a moment of nurture when it’s needed most.

As with so much in motherhood, prevention is critical. Think back to how your baby’s once peaceful sleep was disrupted. It likely wasn’t a day of missed naps that led to fatigue but a few days of disruptions that added up. Now is the time to reflect on your baby’s routine, their environment, and the little changes that may have contributed to this. With a few adjustments, you can help them return to more restful days and peaceful nights.

In the next post, we’ll explore the challenge of early waking. After working so hard to establish a steady feed-wake-sleep routine for your three-month-old, you might find that suddenly; they begin waking after only 30 or 45 minutes of napping, with no sign of settling back down. Who is this 45-minute intruder? What could cause such a change? How long will its shadow linger? And, more importantly, what can you do to help your baby return to their usual nap routine? Turn the page, and we’ll walk through this next stage together.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Bathtime Safety

BWS - 06

Bathing a baby is more than soap, water and hygeine care, it is part of an intimate connection that ties together the delicate threads of love between mother, father, and child. Such a sacred moment of care, must always be guided by alertness, caution and protective care. To keep this time free from danger, here are some guidelines to help parents as they bathe their little one, a moment bathed in both water and tenderness:

1. Supervision: In this shared act, the presence of a watchful eye is paramount. Never leave your baby unattended, not even for a breath. Should something call you away, carry your baby with you, for nothing is worth the risk of stepping away from this precious trust.

2. Temperature: The water that wraps around your child must be gentle, neither hot nor cold. Feel it with the tender skin of your wrist or elbow, seeking that perfect warmth, around 100°F (37.8°C), as if the water itself were a soft caress of safety.

3. Depth: Only a few inches of water are needed to bathe your child. This shallowness becomes a safeguard. In this simplicity, there is peace.

4. Preparation: Before the water touches your baby's skin, prepare everything you need, soap, washcloth, towel, and clothing, within reach. Let this be a ritual of readiness, for every moment spent away from the child is a momenttoo long.

5. Securing Baby: Always hold your baby with care, at least one hand resting on them like a guardian spirit. Newborns, especially, need the steady support of a hand beneath their head and neck, for they are still learning the weight of the world.

6. Gentle Products: Only the softest, most delicate products should touch their skin. Unscented, mild baby soap and shampoo will do, though not every day, for their skin is still discovering itself.

7. Safty Always: Keep the dangers of the adult world, electrical devices, stray spills, far from this sacred space. Let nothing disrupt the safety of the floor beneath your feet or the air around your child.

8. Tenderness in Every Fold: In the gentle act of washing, remember the folds of skin. Clean with care, but never with force, for your hands speak love in their every movement.

Think of bathtime beyond a necessity of cleanliness. It should be viewed as a cherished ritual, where love and safety flow as naturally as the water itself, and where your baby’s first experiences of care are woven with tenderness and protection.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

The Lasting Influence of Parental Touch

BWS - 05

The power of human touch is profound and gentle, a language spoken before words ever form. It is the first of the senses to awaken within us, long before we take our first breath, and its pathways are woven throughout our entire being. Touch, soft and reassuring, is the first way babies learn to understand the world around them. From the very beginning, we are born with a deep need for human connection, and we feel genuinely known through the warmth of physical closeness. For a child, nothing conveys love more clearly than the tender touch of Mom and Dad.

Why does touch matter so much? Through a parent's gentle touch, a child learns the true meaning of comfort, love, and security. It shapes their understanding of these emotions, turning them from abstract ideas into something tangible and felt. We know how essential touch is in those early days, where its absence can leave a child struggling to thrive. But beyond infancy, the loving touch of a parent continues to hold immense value. It nurtures the developing child, offering them a sense of belonging and emotional safety. For both mothers and fathers, this touch becomes a powerful message of love that shapes their child’s heart and soul.

Touch And Development

Love, as the song says, is a many-splendored thing. However, for children, the true understanding of love and affection comes not just from fleeting moments but from their parents' consistent, gentle touch. If that touch is only felt during brief comings and goings, how can a child truly grow in the knowledge of love's tenderness?

Children who are nurtured with warmth and physical closeness carry a precious advantage. They often grow to be healthier, more affectionate, and more trusting. Their hearts become attuned to the connections around them, helping them make wiser choices, manage stress, sleep peacefully, and navigate the world more easily.

While parenting cannot be reduced to simply giving hugs, the absence of consistent physical contact in those early years can leave its mark. Research shows that when children do not receive enough appropriate touch, they miss out on forming critical neural connections vital to their development.

Without this essential bond, children may face challenges such as disruptive behaviors, difficulties in impulse control, and an inability to connect deeply with others. They might struggle to understand their feelings, find it hard to empathize, and have trouble cooperating or trusting those around them. Emotionally, they may feel adrift, unable to express themselves fully, leaving them more vulnerable to sadness and depression.

Through touch, children feel loved and learn how to give and receive love in return, shaping their emotional worlds in ways that words alone cannot.

Touch and Emotions

Human emotions can often be gently divided into two simple categories: those that focus on the self and those that reach outward toward others. Self-focused emotions, like shame, envy, pride, anger, fear, and distrust, are feelings we all experience at times. On the other hand, the emotions that connect us to others, such as sympathy, empathy, gratitude, kindness, and generosity, are the virtues, the tender qualities that make relationships bloom.

These virtues don’t always come naturally because they require us to step outside ourselves and consider the needs of others. That’s why nurturing these pro-social emotions in children can be a delicate process and why touch plays a vital role in helping these feelings grow. Before a child can fully understand the meaning of love, acceptance, or admiration, they first feel these emotions through the warmth of a parent’s touch. A soft hand on their back, a hug, or a simple pat carries emotional messages that words alone cannot.

Touch doesn’t just foster these positive emotions, it helps define them in a child’s heart. The loving touch of a mother or father becomes a channel through which emotional understanding flows. Over time, these touches leave a lasting impression, filling a child’s inner world with emotional value. The more often a child feels compassion or care through physical closeness, the more naturally they begin to express those feelings toward others.

For example, when parents frequently show their affection, gratitude, or approval through touch, their children are more likely to grow with a more profound sense of empathy and kindness, qualities that are so essential for building strong, healthy relationships. A mother’s gentle embrace and a father’s reassuring hand on the shoulder can reinforce the emotional signals shared between them, making them stronger and more lasting.

In the end, touch is like nourishment for the emotions. Without it, a child may feel empty or emotionally vulnerable, like something is missing from their world. In these times, when the world can feel overwhelming, it is more important than ever to fill a child’s heart with the warmth of touch, ensuring they feel secure, loved, and understood.

Touch and Tenderness

We know now that touch is the silent stream through which emotions flow, subtle, unseen, but always there, carving its path. Once these gentle impressions take root, they carry a deep emotional weight, becoming a part of us. The more we receive these loving touches, the more they imprint themselves, shaping our hearts. This is especially true when we speak of tenderness.

Tenderness is something children absorb rather than learn in the traditional sense. Even before they can read or understand complex words, they know what tenderness feels like by watching how their parents care for one another. It’s in the softness of a mother’s voice when she speaks to their father, in the warmth of a father’s smile when he reaches for their mother’s hand. It is seen and felt in the quiet moments, a gentle kiss, a light touch on the shoulder, a warm embrace that shows love without words.

When a daughter watches her father show tenderness to her mother, she quietly begins to understand the kind of love she deserves, the type of man she will one day seek. And when a son observes his father’s gentle actions, he learns how to give love, how to be tender with his siblings, friends, future spouse, and children. These moments of tenderness lay the foundation for all future relationships, teaching them to love with kindness and care.

Tenderness, in its quiet persistence, has the power to transform. It nourishes love and wraps it in a kind of security that only comes from the giving of oneself. It is a gift, one that costs nothing but means everything. And years later, when those children have grown and chosen partners of their own, they will look back on those moments, on the tenderness passed between their parents, and say, "Thank you." Because of that tenderness, they will find the key to their happiness, their way of loving deeply, entirely, and without fear.

Touch Validates

Why is touch so important? Because it gently completes the circle of love and connection. Touch brings the other senses to life, adding depth and meaning to what we see, hear, or say. In a family, touch opens the heart, creating a bond without barriers and a space where love is freely given and felt. It carries an intimacy that words or glances alone can’t convey, weaving together the threads of closeness and trust.

This intimacy isn’t just physical; it’s emotional, a closeness that blooms between parents and children. While words of affirmation are precious, they need the warmth of touch to resonate in a child’s heart fully. A kind word or a loving look can carry emotional weight, but these moments might feel incomplete without the gentle reinforcement of a hug, a hand on the shoulder, or a soft pat on the back. Touch is what turns those words into lasting memories of love.

Think of it like this: when a parent touches their child affectionately, they validate every other message they’ve shared. A simple “I love you” becomes richer when paired with a warm embrace. Encouragement is felt more intensely when a father’s hand rests gently on his child’s shoulder. It’s not that every kind word must be accompanied by touch. Still, when physical affection is a natural part of the parent-child relationship, it strengthens every expression of love and care.

A special reminder for Dads, your touch matters more than you might realize. When you hold your children and offer them those tiny, tender moments of closeness, you’re reinforcing all the love and support you give throughout the day. Without touch, the foundation of emotional intimacy can feel incomplete, leaving a gap where the connection should be.

Children experience life through their senses, and touch brings those experiences into sharp focus. Through your embrace, they begin to understand the world around them, learning what it means to feel safe, loved, and secure. Every time you hold them close, you create memories, of joy, comfort, and warmth, that they will carry with them, tucked away in their hearts. The more you reach out with love, the more cherished these moments will become, treasured long after they’ve grown.

The Practical Side of Touch

Life, busy and full, pulls us in a hundred directions, and yet, it is in the quiet moments of touch that love registers most deeply. It is in the morning hug, the goodnight kiss, the playful wrestle in the living room. It is the touch that lingers, that etches itself into memory, becoming a treasure carried long after the moment.

So how can you keep that closeness alive, even when life gets busy? Well, it starts with the way you show love to each other. Let your children see you hold hands, share a warm embrace, or give that first kiss in the evening when one of you comes home. That simple moment, that one kiss, tells your children all they need to know, that Mom and Dad are doing just fine and that love is alive in their home. They don’t just see it; they feel it, and with that feeling comes security.

Taking advantage of the first opportunity in the morning is an excellent place to begin for your children. It does not matter if cuddles and hugs occur in your room, their room, or any room where you start your day. Even if it is only a few short moments, touch has a cumulative value on your children’s developing sense of acceptance and security. When the family re-gathers in the evening, after Dad and Mom have their first kiss, it is time for everyone to receive hugs and kisses. When practiced routinely, it will become a habit of the heart, not to mention treasured ones as well.

Children also love activities that involve a playful, healthy touch. Wrestling with Dad is often a favorite, and even if it’s not quite a “Mom thing,” just being there, watching with a smile, adds to their love. And don’t forget the soothing power of touch as part of a bedtime routine, a gentle neck or back rub can help your children wind down, sending them to sleep wrapped in positive feelings and comforting memories. The sweetest surprise comes when, as they grow, you find yourself on the receiving end of those same tender gestures.

Remember this as you move through your days: physical touch is essential for building an emotional bond with your children. They will thrive on it, and so will you. These moments of closeness, small and simple, will become treasures in their hearts, lasting long after childhood has passed.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

The Evolution of Modern Feeding Philosophies

BWS - 04

Before the dawn of early childhood theories in the 20th century, parents, guided by an innate wisdom passed through generations, raised their children with the steady hand of common sense. Life unfolded with predictable rhythms, and mothers, in their daily cadence, nursed their babies not only when hunger called but also in harmony with their chores, the rising and setting of the sun, and the pulse of their homes. The routine was not just a part of the mother’s world; it was woven into the fabric of the baby's life, a gentle and consistent rhythm that cradled both of them.

But today, the landscape is cluttered with a jungle of philosophies, each armed with its lexicon and codes to decipher. You might have been told, as you awaited your child’s arrival, to feed on demand and warned against the constraints of schedules, mainly if breastfeeding was your intention. Perhaps terms like "demand schedule" or "self-regulating" danced before your tired eyes, or maybe someone urged you toward the path of "natural feeding," steering you away from the perils of hyper-scheduling. Hyperscheduling, after all, is rigid, and rigidity is frowned upon, at least compared to the looser reins of cry feeding, which itself is surpassed by the attentiveness of cue feeding, a cousin to responsive feeding. And somewhere amidst these ideologies, the often-neglected practice of bottle feeding lingers, the outsider in this intricate dance of feeding styles. I yah, yah!

Let’s see if we can make some sense of all these titles by stepping back to the last century and examining the origin of today’s feeding philosophies.

The Philosophy of Behaviorism: Clock Feeding

Philosophy of Behaviorism: Clock Feeding While the 19th century witnessed a surge in child development theories, it was not until the 20th century that two competing schools of thought captured the public’s attention. The first was the behavioral school, emerging in the early 1900s. Behaviorists emphasize environmental stimuli as the primary influence on human behavior. At the same time, they downplayed the impact of internal factors such as emotions, human will, and human nature. They believed that if you could control the environmental influences, you could engineer the perfect child.

Behaviorism received an unintentional boost with the growing women’s movement of the 1920s, which was symbolized by short hair, short skirts, contraceptives, cigarettes, and bottle feeding, replacing breastfeeding. The latter became possible because of the discovery of an algebraic equation called baby- formula. Since “formula” could be offered anytime, a new feeding practice emerged called schedule feeding or “clock feeding.” A regimented feeding schedule of every 4 hours was considered to be in the child's best interest, and every “good” mother was expected to follow it to the minute. The baby who showed signs of hunger sooner than 4 hours was left to “cry it out” because the clock, not the baby, determined when feedings occurred with little regard to the baby’s immediate needs or the parent’s natural inclination to intervene.(1)

The Philosophy of Neo-primitivism:

Baby-Led Feeding By the mid-1940s, a second theory, an adaptation of Sigmund Freud’s views, started to nudge the rigidity of behaviorism from center stage. A small group of Freud’s 20th-century followers put forth the idea that children are born psychologically damaged as a result of the birthing process. Working within the void of limited science of the day, it was speculated that labor and delivery were so traumatizing to the unborn child that birthing became the wellspring of all future mental imbalances and insecurities. Otto Rank was the Austrian psychoanalyst credited as the first champion of the birth-trauma view (1929).

While his theory did not catch on right away, it eventually inspired the Neo-primitivistic school of child development, supported by Ribble (1944), Aldrich (1945), Frank (1945) and Trainham, Pilafian, and Kraft (1945). The title “Neoprimitivistic” is not name-calling but reflects a specific school of thought that postulates that the separation at birth disrupts the in-utero relational harmony between mother and child. Therefore, the primary goal of early parenting is to re-establish or re-attach the baby, emotionally speaking.

The theory works from a bizarre two-fold assumption that babies in the womb have a perfect “emotional” relationship with their mothers but lose emotional attachment during the birthing process. This leads to a second assumption: that every newborn has a lingering, subconscious desire to return to the security of his mother’s womb. Since that cannot happen physically, the mother is to create and mimic an artificial womb-like environment and maintain it long after birth. All of her efforts are aimed at reversing the psychic shock brought on by the trauma of birth.

From this theory came particular re-attachment protocols. Reaching the baby emotionally requires the day-and-night presence and availability of the mother, who is urged to return to a “primitive style” of nurturing.(2) “The baby should be endlessly cradled, sleep with the mother, and be breastfed well into the second or third year. The child is to be the center of the family universe, where all practices minister to his comfort and minimize his anxiety.”(3)

By 1949, the birth trauma theory, lacking objective verifiable data, was dismissed with considerable skepticism. Around the same time, the school of behaviorism, while still strong, was beginning to lose influence, partly due to an up-and-coming pediatrician whose first book, Baby and Child Care, sold 50 million copies in his lifetime. His name was Dr. Benjamin Spock.

By today’s standards, Dr. Spock was a centrist and best known for advocating common-sense parenting while stressing that babies are better served with a flexible routine than a fixed schedule. He rejected behavioristic one-size-fits-all dictates on everything from strict feeding schedules to potty training. He also dismissed the child-centered extremes of Neo-primitivism, which denied all aspects of structure and routine.(4)

By the 1980s, however, Dr. Spock’s centrist influence began to erode because of social conservatives, who thought his views were too permissive, and social liberals, who declared his parenting advice too controlling. With the polarization of Spock’s views and the decline of his popularity, there came a resurgence of the birth-trauma theory.

While the foundational tenets of the 1940s birth-trauma theory did not change, the modern version took on a new name. Today, it is referred to as Attachment Parenting, which, in truth, has very little connection to the theories of infant attachment. They are linked in name only, not by science. It is essential to note the distinctions here. The theory of infant attachment is the accepted belief that physical touch is a significant necessity for survival.

As authors, we believe that human touch is a baby’s first language, communicating love and security through the portal of the senses. “Touch” is as essential as proper nutrition, and the lack of either will lead to failure to thrive.

Parents should minister to their babies' actual needs and vulnerabilities; however, they should be cautious of any parenting theory that creates extreme or false vulnerabilities. That is when healthy protection turns to unhealthy overprotection, to the long-term detriment of the child. Attachment Parenting advocates of the 1980s may have hijacked the name, but they substituted an old, discarded theory for the science behind actual infant-parent attachment.

Regardless of what it is called today, Attachment Parenting or Re-Attachment Parenting, it is still the same philosophy, drawn from the same birth trauma beliefs and assumptions originally offered by Otto Rank (1929) and expanded on by Dr. Ribble (1944). Just as it was in the past, the modern protocols for Attachment Parenting continue to be very labor intensive, with a strong emphasis on mothers mimicking the womb, first by keeping her baby in her day-and-night presence, the sling by day and co-sleeping with her at night, and second, through constant and continual nursing, which becomes the substitute umbilical cord.

This is why adherents of Attachment Parenting elevate nursing beyond the nutritive value of breastmilk. It is also why a mother can never breastfeed too much, too long or too often, but only too little. Even if it is the third feeding in thirty minutes, the Attachment Parenting mom is acting on the fearful assumption that every cry, if not a signal of hunger, is a potential sign of attachment failure. It all becomes a vicious cycle. Sad to say, the recommended Attachment Parenting protocols required to manufacture a “secure attached child” too often produce the opposite: an emotionally-stressed, high-need, insecure baby and one tired mom. Creating the Bogeyman

After more than 80 years of speculation behind the theory, no conclusive evidence has been provided, nor has a convincing body of research offered that supports the birth-trauma premise on which the modern Attachment Parenting philosophy is based. Meanwhile, the science refuting it continues to grow, especially in light of one fact of nature: There is no life form on earth, simple or complex, human or animal, in which the offspring spontaneously seeks to retreat to the past in search of an old attachment.

Unfortunately, as long as the birthing process is marketed as a “bogeyman” that inflicts trauma on helpless babies, the Attachment Parenting remedy will always have willful adherents. However, is the womb a paradise to which the newborn seeks to return? To justify the extreme tenants of Attachment Parenting, in this modern age of science, proponents continue to present to new and unsuspecting parents the birthing process in horrific, distressing language. They assign to the helpless infant feelings of parental abandonment and betrayal that must be overcome if true attachment is to take place.

In the scientific world, this is known as apophenia (attempting to make a connection where no connections exist). They say a baby is born fully conscious of a traumatic upheaval brought on during birthing, in which he is forcibly thrust from the warmth, protection, and security of the womb and totally exposed to a new world. In this new world, he must exert effort to obtain food, draw his breath, gasp, cough, and struggle to survive.

Does the birthing process actually do all that? How about a more accurate, rational, life-giving perspective that acknowledges that it is only because of the birthing process that a baby is truly liberated from a condition of incredible restraint? A baby in the womb cannot express himself or communicate even the most basic needs. He lived in a world of darkness, in a confined sack where the nutrients that supported life began to mix with his body fluids. It was a place where touch was not permitted, nor was there the opportunity to hear the voices of love, care, and protection. A baby is saved only by the miracle and beauty of the birthing process that truly delivers him from bondage to freedom, where he can participate in a wide range of human sensations. For the first time, he can experience the touch of a loving mother and father and hear the sounds of their voices, as well as the beauty of the songbird. He can experience a thousand rays of color carried on light beams that the womb prevented him from seeing previously. He can laugh, move freely, and discover a world previously closed off to him. All this is made possible by the single passageway carried on the wings of the birthing process.

If birth is actually a moment to remember, then it is a moment to celebrate, not one to return to restraint and bondage. Finally, if trauma is attached to the memory of birthing, by what neurologic function is this achieved? Here is a fact to consider: Newborns have zero memory of birth, let alone the ability to recall anxiety that is specific to a preborn experience. Neuronal development and memory function depend on the brain receiving highly-oxygenated blood from breathing. Breathing cannot begin until the lungs inflate, which occurs after, not during, the birth process. Higher brain centers that control memory are still developing at birth and afterward. Thus, where do the facts lead?

While Behaviorists emphasize outward structure and not the inner person, Neo-primitivists emphasize the inner person at the expense of outward structure. We believe both approaches are extreme and detrimental to healthy parenting outcomes. There is a better way; it is found in the center. Parent-directed feeding is its name.

Notes:

1. Dr. Rupert Rogers wrote on the problems of breastfeeding during the 1930s and 1940s. He told mothers to be old-fashioned. What did he mean by that? He said to go back to nursing periods arranged as follows: 6:00 a.m., 9:00 a.m., Noon, 3:00 p.m., 6:00 p.m., 10:00 p.m., and once when the baby wakes in the night. Although that type of feeding was a schedule, it was not referred to as such. The term “schedule” referred to a nursing technique more than a routine. Mother’s Encyclopedia (New York: The Parents Institute, Inc., 1951), p. 122.

2. Ribble, Margaret, The Right of Infants (New York: Columbia University Press 1943).

3. McCandless, Boyd, Children and Adolescents (New York: Holt, Reinehart and Winston, 1961), pp. 13-14.

4. Spock, Benjamin, M.D., Baby and Child Care (Pocket Books/Simon & Schuster Inc, 1996)

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Sustained versus Fragmented Sleep

BWS - 03

What is REM sleep? REM stands for Rapid Eye Movement and reflects a quality of sleep that is necessary for memory consolidation, emotional regulation, and advanced cognitive growth. In infants, it is also referred to as "Active Sleep” due to observable physical signs like body movements, irregular breathing, and rapid eye movements under closed eyelids.

Simiilar to a host of other neulogic benefits and deficincys, there is a difference between REM sleep and active sleep in infants when comparing those who achieve extended nighttime sleep early on versus those who do not. Infants who sleep through the night early tend to transition between sleep cycles more smoothly, allowing for longer and more consistent stretches of REM sleep. As a result, healthy REM sleep promotes better memory consolidation, emotional regulation, and cognitive development as their brains complete more efficient sleep cycles.

In contrast, infants who wake frequently during the night experience fragmented sleep cycles, which can disrupt REM sleep and its associated benefits. This interruption may delay the brain's processing of daily experiences and hinder emotional and cognitive development.

The fact that infants who sleep through the night experience fewer interruptions in active sleep explains a lot about their daytime contentment. Infants who achieve extended nighttime sleep tend to achieve a better quality of consolidated and restorative sleep cycles, which in turn promote better brain development. They are also more likely to transition between sleep stages without fully waking, preserving the structure of their sleep cycles. This, in turn, supports healthy cognitive and emotional growth.

Again, the contrast is clear. Infants with fragmented sleep experience shorter and interrupted cycles, limiting restorative REM sleep and potentially slowing memory consolidation and processing of new information.

In summary, infants who achieve extended nighttime sleep enjoy more stable and beneficial REM and active sleep, supporting cognitive and emotional development. Those who do not may experience more disrupted active sleep, leading to less efficient memory and experience processing.

Infant Sleep Depravations

BWS - 02

The human brain is the master of the universe, with innate abilities. It seeks healthy growth and, when necessary, acts as a skilled physician to bring essential repair to the growth process. Sleep is not just a break from daily life; it is a critical period when myelination occurs—a process that coats nerve fibers with a protective layer called myelin. This sheath ensures that messages between neurons travel quickly and efficiently, enabling clear thoughts, stable emotions, and coordinated actions.

However, this vital process falters when sleep is disrupted or continuous nighttime sleep is never achievedd, with serious consequences for brain function and development.

The Power of Myelination

During deep sleep, especially during REM and slow-wave stages, the brain produces myelin, strengthening its neural pathways. Without adequate sleep, this process slows down, particularly affecting children and adolescents, whose brains are still developing. Like young plants deprived of water, their growth and potential can be stunted.

The Contruction Cells

Oligodendrocytes are the cells responsible for creating and maintaining myelin. When sleep is insufficient, their ability to repair and produce myelin diminishes, leaving nerve fibers vulnerable. This results in weaker neural connections, impairing the brain's ability to communicate efficiently.

Neural Inflammation and Damage

Sleep deprivation, which stem from unhealthy sleep patters, has a way of triggering a type of inflammation in the brain, which damages oligodendrocytes and degrades existing myelin. This slows down neural signals, affecting cognitive and emotional functions and leading to a decline in overall brain health.

Long-term Impact on Developing Minds

Sleep deprivation is often equated with tiredness, and fatigue. Hoever, the effcts of sleep deprivation extend far beyond fatigue. For children, disrupted myelination can impair cognitive, motor, and emotional development, making learning, memory, and attention more challenging as they grow.

Synaptic Plasticity?

In the world of neuro science, the brain's ability to adapt and strengthen its connections based on experience is refer to as synaptic plasticity— Myelination and synaptic plasticity work hand in hand, and when one is disrupted, the other suffers. Sleep deprivation hampers this balance, limiting the brain's capacity to learn and grow.

In Summary

Ensuring healthy sleep patterns for infants and young children is not just about avoiding fatigue; it is the basis on which life itself is constructed. Creating the right patterns of healthy sleep is an act of love and care, and the absence of such care can have lasting consequences that no loving and knowledgable  parents would wish on their children.

The story of sleepless nights is not just one of fatigue and fussy babies; it is a tale that speaks to the heart of our humanity, reminding us of the vital importance of nurturing our minds through the restorative power of sleep. Healthy infant sleep weaves the first threads of a child’s future success, but keeping a child on a starvation ration of sleep is not love, it is a tragedy.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group

Neuro-Bilogical Advantages of Continuous Nighttime Sleep

BWS - 01

In the still of the night, as the world outside seems to hold its breath, infants who surrender to sleep are unknowingly weaving the intricate web of their own development. Like tender buds gathering strength before blooming, they are gifted with neurobiological advantages shaping their future.

Brain development finds its rhythm in the realm of the night, where time bends and reality melts. During sleep, the mind begins to snip away what is no longer needed, carving space for clarity. The unnecessary fragments of the mind are gently pruned, and stronger, more efficient connections sprout in their place. This delicate process ensures that memory, attention, and learning take root in the fertile soil of a child's growing mind.

And then there is memory, a type of trunk storing thread of experience. During those sacred hours of rest, particularly in the depths of REM sleep, the brain becomes a storyteller, replaying and storing the moments of the day. In the shadows of slumber, it is here that the foundation of learning is laid. Each sound, every touch, and each new word encountered is etched more profoundly into the infant’s consciousness, forming the stepping stones of language and movement.

But sleep is not just a builder of the mind but also the gentle keeper of emotions. In those quiet hours, the dance of neurotransmitters begins. Serotonin and dopamine, the alchemists of mood, work tirelessly to bring balance. An infant who sleeps well becomes a child capable of facing the world with greater resilience, their tiny heart more steady, their cries less frequent, as if the night itself has whispered secrets of calm into their being.

Meanwhile, as the infant drifts through the stages of deep sleep, growth hormones quietly make their presence known. They are the silent architects, ensuring that both brain and body grow strong, mending what is broken and nurturing what is new. These moments of stillness are when the miracles of physical and neural growth unfold.

The brain refines its ability to perceive the world as the infant sleeps. Sensory pathways are forged, allowing them to hear the lullaby of a mother’s voice, feel the warmth of a father’s hand, and see the twinkling stars in the night sky. This is where the magic of perception comes to life, preparing the child to embrace the wonders of sight, sound, and touch.

Through these hours of uninterrupted rest, the infant also learns the quiet art of attention. Focus sharpens as sleep nurtures their ability to engage with the world, their gaze lingering longer, their curiosity blossoming with each passing day.

At the heart of it all lies the autonomic nervous system, a force as ancient as life itself. Sleep, the silent guardian, helps regulate this system, ensuring that the heartbeat remains steady and the breath easily flows. In these small, unseen ways, the infant’s resilience grows, and with it, their ability to thrive in a world filled with both beauty and chaos.

These blessings of sleep are not fleeting gifts—they are the foundation upon which an infant builds their future, ensuring that the child grows in body and spirit, capable of facing life with strength and grace.

© 2024 ~ All Rights Reserved -Charleston Publishing Group